Two Little Words

Sweet Cheeks

2011-05-04T03:02:00.000-07:00

Bunny Hop

2011-05-03T14:55:00.000-07:00

For the weeks leading up to Easter, Madelyn carried around her "Here Comes Peter Cotton Tale" book (that played the song) and would "read" it to me while she bopped her head back and forth. She used those head bopping maneuvers at church on Easter Sunday.

After having read the book over (and over and over and over and over) again, imagine her excitement when she actually got to hunt for those Easter eggs! Though this is her third (!) Easter, its the first that she was actually aware of what was going on. She had a taste of Easter egg hunting at her daycare providers house on the Thursday before Easter. She could not be separated by that darned purple plastic egg for love nor money.

For me?!? More eggs?!?!

On the Saturday before Easter Sunday, not only did Madelyn "help" make cupcakes, we had a bar-b-que with a couple of close friends and their children. It was sunny and beautiful and Madelyn LOVED hunting for those eggs. She also loved the candy she found in them and now walks around saying "cannee, cannnee".

What, you mean you're not supposed to eat the batter off the counter, Mama?

Easter Sunday was not as lovely - but we braved the chilly cold to go Easter egg hunting with her Clark cousins. She *loved* it.

What she did not love was having Mama remind her that William's Easter basket was William's. Not hers.

Turns out William doesn't like to share much either. He does, however, love new soft things. Especially if Mama lets him eat them.

Mama is a lame Mama and did not have her camera during any of the Easter egg hunting. So, we'll have to wait for pictures from our friends and family to share those bits of fun.

Sweet William

2011-05-03T14:35:00.000-07:00

When I was pregnant with Madelyn, my dear friend Jana gave me a beautifully written book called Tell Me My Story, Mama by Deb Lund. It's the very sweet story of a young girl asking her mother about the night she was born and being reassured that the story will always be hers and hers alone and the new baby the family is expecting will have it's own special story.

It is beautiful and still makes me cry when I read it.

Madelyn pulled it off the shelf the other day and we read it. In doing so, I realized I'd never actually written Will's special story down.

In some ways, I was so calm about the idea of having another baby and yet I constantly wondered how this one would be different. I was really nervous that Will would get too big and I'd end up having a c-section. Ultimately, all that really matters is a healthy baby. But to the day I die, I will never forget the moment Madelyn came into this world. Not ever. And being a selfish sort, I wanted that experience once more. I wondered if Jim would be home or if I'd have to meet him at the hospital. I wondered if Will would come quickly as people predicted. I hoped I didn't have to labor too much around Madelyn because I didn't want to upset her. I was really curious if I'd handle the pain any better than I did with Madelyn.

Because of my gestational diabetes, I was going for non stress twice a week. I knew Will was comfortable in there and I knew I was dilated for weeks before I had him. The surprising thing about that for me was that in the weeks before I had Will, I was as dilated as I was when I was begging Jim to take me to the hospital with Madelyn. While I was ready to get the show on the road, I was also aware that GD babies tend to have underdeveloped lungs....so I was doing my best to keep him cooking.

Will had other plans for us.

Thursday, October 21st - 3 am
Jim had an odd shift and had just gotten home and crawled in bed. I remember him saying how tired he was and I remember thinking how much Will had been moving around.

At around 4 am, I woke up feeling pretty wet. At this point in my pregnancy, it wasn't uncommon for me to be really, really sweaty and I thought that's what was happening. I had to use the restroom, so I rolled (as gracefully as possible when you're 9 months pregnant) out of bed and headed toward our bathroom.

And as I got there, my water broke.

For half a heartbeat, I thought I'd wet my pants. Don't judge, because if you've ever been pregnant, you know it happens.

It didn't take me too long to realize that was not the case. I remember sitting down on the toilet in utter shock. I grabbed a towel and walked back into the bedroom to tell Jim.

Poor guy - he was absolutely beat. He'd just gotten to bed after a 13 hour shift and I'm waking him up with "honey, it's time". I think he was running on pure adrenalin.

Earlier in the pregnancy, I'd asked my OB if I was safe to take a shower if my water had broken. I knew that I might not get a shower for awhile and I'd better get it while I could. She'd said that unless my contractions were painful, I could take that time. And here's the thing, I wasn't having any serious contractions! I was having them, but they were so mild I could barely register them. I'd had worse menstrual cycles than that.

So, while Jim ran around packing some clothing and putting things in the car, I took a shower, styled my hair and put on some makeup. When we were ready to go, I went into my Mom's room to let her know that baby was on his way. She was more than a little shocked that I was dressed, with my hair and make up done.   I told her I'd call her when we were checked in.

Then I went in to kiss my first baby goodbye. I was really emotional when I tiptoed into her room. Madelyn has been and always will be the very first miracle I had a hand in. She is my heart of hearts and a tiny part of me didn't want to let go of those last minutes that she'd be my only baby and have my undivided attention. I knew that the new baby was going to rock her world and in the long run, it'd be amazing...but that she wasn't always going to like it until then.

Jim and I hopped into our Durango and headed for Tacoma General. Jim hadn't taken my warnings that baby could show up at any time seriously and he'd left all of his gear in the tractor he was driving that week. So, on the way to the hospital, we made a pitstop at the Pacific UPS site to grab his stuff. I have to say, I think I was rather calm for being in labor.

At this point, though, I still wasn't feeling any serious contractions.

I texted my boss and let her know I was in labor. I wanted to call everyone, but it was just 5 in the morning, so I decided to wait. I did call my friend, Rebecca, who was scheduled to come shoot Will's delivery.

On the way to the hospital, we finally had to break down and pick a name for our poor kid.

We'd had two names that we both really liked and we couldn't make up our minds. I had my favorite and Jim had his, but neither of us felt strongly enough about it to say to the other "this *has* to be the name". I'll never forget driving down 167 having a calm conversation about how we really did need to name him....and realizing he was coming within a matter of hours!

In the end, Madelyn was the deciding factor. For months she'd been on the verge of major talking, walking around the house saying "dub a dub a dubya" when we asked her to talk. Jim really liked the idea of her calling her brother "W", so William it was.

And his name has significance. William is his paternal grandfather's middle name. It is the name of my grandfather's brother, Grandma Clark's brother and Grandma Freda's second child. Warren is my father's middle name.

William Warren
As my mother in law would say, "it's very presidential".

We arrived at the hospital about 5:30 and got into a triage room. I remember being very embarrassed that I was continuing to leak all over the place. Hospital floors may be cleaned constantly, but seriously - there is no 3 second rule at the hospital.

By 6 I was in a labor room. By then, we'd called all of the parents and my best friend Sue. We'd also talked to Rebecca and because she had commitments that paid more bills than photography did, realized she just wasn't going to make it....

Since I was feeling so fine and not really having any major contractions, Jim sacked out on the parent bed while I walked and walked and walked. My nurse was amazing. Her name was Deb and since she didn't have a ton of other patients that day, she spent a lot of time in my room talking with and telling me funny stories about being an L&D nurse for 20 years.

By 8, my OB had been by. She'd checked me and we'd decided that since the contractions weren't really coming on as strongly as would be good, we would start some pitocin. I had a history of contractions that don't really get regular. With Madelyn, I'd labored for 24 hours before my contractions got regular and really started producing the results we needed - and it took that little kick of pitocin to get there. Living in the northwest, there are a lot of opinions about how much intervention one needs in a delivery. Some women try to have as few as possible and perhaps those mothers would have waited longer to see what happened. I can understand why they'd feel that way and what I know is this: my OB knew how scared I was of a c-section and knew I wanted to try and have him vaginally. She also knew the longer we waited until that 24 hour mark after my water broke, the more likely I would be to have a c-section. Ultimately, she left the decision up to me and I trusted her. I'm glad I did. We started pitocin about 9 am.

Since I was feeling so little pain, I decided to forgo the epidural even though we'd started pitocin so that I could continue to walk and keep things moving. So, I walked and talked to Deb while Jim slept. I paced my room. I bounced on the birthing ball. I walked the halls. All the while the pain I was feeling wasn't overwhelming to me, which was refreshing after my labor with Madelyn. Eventually, though my contractions got a lot strong and I started having to breath through them.  I still wasn't at the point that I thought I needed an epidural. I remember at one point, Deb was watching the monitor and said, "Heather! You could breath through that? That was STRONG!". I don't know how I did it when I was begging for an epidural at 2 cm with Madelyn...but it just didn't hurt as much this time.

At 11 am, Deb suggested that we find out exactly where the anesthesiologist was at and how long the wait was. I was starting to have to have a bit more pain and I remember telling her that it'd probably be good to get in line for that epidural. I knew it could take awhile. The anesthesiologist was available, so he came pretty quickly, but Deb did check before he was there. I started going through a pretty intense contraction as she checked. Things seemed to have progressed quite quickly because as it happened, she told me that will was "right there" and to do my best not to push just yet. Things seemed to slow down and I was hyper focused on breathing and Deb's face. In my minds eye, all I remember almost a tunnel vision with Deb's face at the center of it and the room around us fuzzy. This one moment in time is probably the biggest reason I will never forget Deb. She knew my OB thought he was a big baby. Earlier she'd said my OB had already talked to her about "Plan B" in case Will's shoulders got caught up or we had to take him via c-section. She knew that scared the bejesus out of me. She also know how much it meant to me to have the experience of welcoming Will into the world without a c-section. So, while I was focused on breathing and her face, she said, "Heather, he is so right there. I can feel down to his shoulders and he's not going to get cleared up on anything.   Girl, you've got this and it's going to happen just like you want it too so you can stop worrying". It was the one moment, during my actual labor that we both Deb and I teared up.

We also decided it was time to wake up poor Jim, lest he miss the birth of his son.

The anesthesiologist came and put in my epidural but he did caution me that because I was so far progressed, it would not block everything. There simply wasn't time for the medicine to work. He wasn't lying about that.

Things went pretty quickly from here on out. My contractions were intense and I felt every little bit of them. I am proud to say that I never cried. I'd felt like such a cry baby during Madelyn's labor....but with Will's I was just a ball of determination. It helped a ton that things were happening so quickly. I ~~might not have~~ definitely wouldn't have done so well had I labored for a long time. Oh, don't get me wrong.....I panted and gritted my teeth and probably made embarrassing noises, but I didn't cry.

When my OB showed up, she swung the mirror around so I could see and we started pushing. During the second big push, my OB, Deb and Jim were all chanting at me to push hard! Part of me didn't want to because it HURT but what came out of my mouth was, "This is a whole lot closer to natural that I wanted!". It only took seconds before my OB said, "It's going to be over soon, kiddo, push hard and reach down and pull your son into your arms".

I have to take a minute here to tell you how much I love my OB. She was with me through our miscarriage. When I went through the D&C for that, she stood beside my bed and held my hand while the medication put me under and was holding my hand when I came around and started crying.

She called me every other day when I was pregnant with Madelyn and we thought I was going to miscarry to check and see how I was feeling.

She was there when Madelyn came into the world and stayed with me, holding my hand, while Jim stood with Madelyn while they helped her unclog her lungs.

She helped keep me calm when I was nervous about a c-section and big babies.

She never once chided me about my weight.

She always told me what a good mom I was for doing everything I could to be healthy during both of my pregnancies.

And she's laid back enough to know that even though I'm all about Western medicine, that we could still slow down and savor the moment and let me be a part of the delivery if things were progressing well.

So in that moment, when she told me to pull my son into my arms, I was a little bit in love with her and so thankful that she knew what it felt like to be a mom.

And at 12:42 pm, I did just that. I reach down, slid my hands between his arms and body and pulled him into this world.

And my world will never be the same.

The next hour was so peaceful, as far as deliveries go. We delayed the cord clamping for a few minutes while Jim and I stared at our handsome baby boy. Then, Jim snipped the cord. He didn't hesitate for one second like he thought he might. I think Madelyn's birth had proven to him that childbirth wasn't as scary as he remembered it being.

I held William and let him latch for a bit. Eventually, Deb needed to measure him and weigh him (a respectable 6 pounds 15 ounces and 18.25 inches...not so big after all).

Once that had been done and I was feeling capable of standing up, they moved me to my own room. We stayed for a little over 24 hours. Jim and I were anxious to get home to our sweet girl. I didn't want anyone bringing her to the hospital only to take her away again. I didn't think that would go over well and it would break my heart to have her cry.

I was up for most of that night, just holding my little guy...knowing this was about the only time I wouldn't also be responsible for taking care of Madelyn. I wanted to savor some time with my sweet boy before I was the mom of two.

And sweet he is, our sweet William. His little face just lights up my whole world and I can't believe I've been so blessed to get to help guide him through life.

Thankful Thursday

2011-04-07T05:00:00.000-07:00

I'm so thankful....

For all of the folks below, including the ones that weren't yet a part of the family because they yet graced us with their presence (I mean that sincerely, it is by God's grace that they are here)

For this little guy, even when he falls asleep before storytime

That these two are starting to have fun together

For this little gal, especially when she's figured out something new...like sunglasses

For this big guy

Who is also this guy when he's all cleaned up in spiffy duds

To these gals, who'll always have my back, no matter how long it's been since we've talked

That this is who is watching out for me from upstairs

That this is what flies over my home

That the husband and I both have one of these

Certain peeps from here (you know who you are) that keep me sane in all this mommyhoodness

Wordless Wednesday - 5 Months!!!

2011-04-06T10:57:00.000-07:00

Happy is as happy does

Yeah, I'm just that good looking!

Hello Mr. Gorilla, I do love you

Look into my eyes

God bless Mama and Daddy and my sissies...oh yeah, and Mr. Gorilla

Tupelo Honey

2011-04-01T09:47:00.000-07:00

It's amazing how a song can bring you right back into the heart of a moment.

It's been a long time since I've thought about my time in Korea. Certainly I think about it in passing on a daily basis. I have Korean masks on display in my office. I wear my Seoul Pub rugby shirt to bed on a regular basis. Very recently, news of events in South Korea have made me think about what it was like to be an ex-pat living in a country that is, technically, still at war and while not widely publicized has daily border squirmishes.

But I haven't really had one of those moments when my senses are thrown back into the moment and if I close my eyes that world swirls around me.

Today I was trying to concentrate on a project and put on my headphones to block out other noise. On a random play list the song "Tupelo Honey" by Van Morrison came up.

And in a moment, I was thrown back into a little bar "up the hill" that we went to on a regular basis. If I closed my eyes, I could smell the aftershave of the boys on 48 hour leave and the wafting aroma of foods not found anyplace stateside. I could hear the music in the background and the laughter of people enjoying the freedom of leave or the freedom of a moment without students encircling their knees begging for attention. I could taste the kool aide and soju of a "kettle". I could feel the heat of the night and the weight of the humid air on my skin.

Normally Van Morrison wouldn't be something I would listen to. Through a friend, I'd met a sweet man named Skip. Skip was a contractor that worked with the US Military on security issues and regularly traveled to Seoul. Skip had shockingly white, thick hair, a smile a mile wide, a gentele demeanor and when we danced my nose would be squarely in his chest.

Skip was from the East Coast and had, by all accounts, a lovely wife and two grown daughters he adored. Having been in Korea awhile, I knew the difference between someone looking to step outside of his life back in the world and someone who never waivered from what he was, no matter where his location or distance from his family. Skip was the latter. If he asked me to dance or bought me a kettle, it wasn't because he was trying to forget his wife, Joy, or accomplish some sort of ulterior motive. He just wanted to dance with a friend.

Skip was the sort of man that worried about us girls being in an unsafe environment and would call us when he heard intel that might suggest we should move to safer ground for a period of time. He never told us any details, he just casually suggested that we might want to spend time south of the Hahn River so that should something happen, we not be trapped when they blew the bridges crossing the river. He would bring us treats from home....magazines and books that we couldn't find in Seoul. He would go shopping at the PX and bring us a fridge full of food that we'd have to pay triple the price for at a black market shop. He genuinely cared about our well being.

Skip regularly told me I reminded him of his youngest daughter. One night he requested the DJ play Tupelo Honey and asked me to dance. He said that when he was at home and out and about, he'd always dance with his daughter to the song because she was "an angel of the first degree". For the rest of our friendship, whenever Skip was in town, he'd request that song and ask me to dance. Skip knew that some of the experiences I was having at the time made me question my worth and would continue to lead me down a road of insecurity and self doubt. Being young and inexperienced in a environment like I was in can do that to a girl and it took me a long time and a good deal of therapy to reclaim what I'd always known to be true about myself.

Before I left Korea, I saw Skip and we danced to Tupelo Honey. At the end of the song, he said, "Heather, please always remember that you're as sweet as Tupelo Honey."

I don't know what became of Skip, we lost contact when I left Korea.

So for the sweet young girl that I used to be...

For the sweet young daughter I'm raising who will hopefully never question herself the way her mama did and will not have to go the sort of self doubt I did...

And for Skip where ever he may be.....

My Friday

2011-03-31T08:42:00.000-07:00

It may be raining outside but my heart is light and my spirit is free.

It's my Friday.
I have an amazing husband.
I have beautiful, healthy children.
I have a great family.
I am not dealing with unspeakable natural catastrophy or leaders that rule by oppression.
I have a God and He is good.

And the best thing about me is them....

Miss Chomper

2011-03-30T21:00:00.000-07:00

Speaking of teeth...

We've had our first biting incident.

When I picked Madelyn up from daycare last night, I was informed by one of the little boys that Madelyn had bitten him. After talking to her daycare provider, it turns out that Madelyn has an admirer. This same little boy ~~is obessed with~~ loves to play with our beautiful little miss and follows her around constantly ~~torturing~~ trying to pick her up or hold her hand.

Apparently our VIG (very independent girl) had enough and turned around and bit him yesterday.

The mature, responsible parent in me is not happy that my daughter bit someone else.

The educating parent in me spent time explaining to her that teeth are not for biting (though I am not sure if the message reached her or just sounded like the teacher on Charlie Brown).

The insecure parent in me is a little afraid she'll turn into "that child" that other parents complain about.

The vain parent in me thinks it's pretty darn cute that this little boy is so taken with Madelyn....she is pretty adorable if I do say so myself.

The mama bear in me says "that's right, little dude, mess with my daughter and she'll chomp on you".

Teeth are not for biting...and they sure are cute.

Lovin' This

2011-03-30T20:00:00.001-07:00

File this in the "Things I Love" Category....

I love to watch Madelyn run to people when she's excited to see them. Her face is all aglow, her eyes are wide and excited and if she can say your name, she'll call it over and over again.

She does this when I pick her up from daycare.
She does this when Jim comes downstairs after waking up in the afternoon.
She does this when people she knows come to the front door.

She'll take your hand and drag you back to whatever you're doing at the moment.

I just love it and all the innocence and youth it represents.

Pearly Whites

2011-03-30T20:00:00.000-07:00

My girl has a healthy fear of our pediatrician, much to my pediatricians understandable dismay. We have a wonderful doctor - she's patient with my many questions, my "worry wartedness" and completely understanding and supportive of working moms since she is one herself. She's funny and very gentle with our children. You can't blame Madelyn though, every time she goes, she's getting a shot or her ears are being scraped. It's so bad that at our last visit, Madelyn cried when William was getting shots!

So, you can imagine my trepidation for Madelyn's first dental appointment. I didn't want to be the mother with "that" child.... The child with nasty teeth and numerous cavities because said child flipped a lid every time her mother came near her with a tooth brush. We do brush. Every night. And every night Madelyn flips a lid. I try to be as nonchalant about it as I can be. While Madelyn has "her turn" with her Piglet toothbrush and apple flavored trainer paste, I lotion her up. Then, it's "Mama's turn".

Queue screaming child soundtrack here.

Every night.

So, imagine my delight when not only does it turn out that Madelyn's teeth are in "better shape than most", but that she actually liked riding up and down the dental chair (even if she had to be coaxed the first time by having Mama and William ride with her). She thought "Mr. Thirsty" was pretty cool the way he sucked water out of her mouth. She wasn't so sure about the little mirror, but she sure did like the part where she got to pick out a new tooth brush, 5 stickers ("more, Mama?") and a little toy.

She has a new best friend, Holly, whom she talks about nightly ("Mama, go Holly and up, down?") and I have a new phrase to help coax her...."let's brush the sugar bugs off your teeth, darlin!"

Brothers & Sisters

2011-03-30T05:00:00.000-07:00

(Okay, maybe a few words this Wednesday. It's long, but there are cute baby giggles :) )

Staying Put

2011-03-24T23:09:00.000-07:00

Is it wrong that I want this little guy in my room until he's 43?

I know my husband would object. I'm guessing the little guy will object in about 8 years. I'm quite certain his wife, when he has one, would object too.

But the monkey and me, we agree....he needs to stay put so I can listen to his sweet little noises all night long and lean over and kiss his little head.

Name Games

2011-03-24T20:38:00.000-07:00

Madelyn - A woman of magdala, High Tower

I never set out to give my child a biblical name. I'm not opposed to it, it's just not what I set out to do when I suggested Madelyn as a first name. What I really wanted was to be able to call my little girl "Maddy" as a child and allow her to have a very professional, yet feminine name as an adult. The funny thing is, Jim and I almost exclusively call her Madelyn, not Maddy.

For months we've been trying to get her to say "Madelyn". So, imagine my "aha" moment last night when we were going through our nighttime routine and I realized she's been trying to say "Maddy" for quite sometime. Mama just didn't understand Madelynese.

Mama: Can you say Madelyn?
Mads: Mah-ee
Mama: Yes, you... (Mama is thinking she's saying "me" in a southernish accent)
Mads: Mah-ee (Mama thinks she's saying Mommy now)
Mama: Who's Mommy? (Mads points to me)
Mama: Who are you?
Mads: Mah-ee (points to herself) Mah-ee (points to herself again) Mah-mee (points to me)
Mama: Ohhhh!!! Are you saying "Maddy!?!?

At this point, she wrinkles up her forehead, looks at me like I'm completely dense and says: Yeah, Mama, Mah-ee.

It only took her 24 months and the kid is already smarter than me.

Sweet William

2011-03-22T19:00:00.001-07:00

My sweet, sweet boy....

I just can't tell you how much I love you. Yes, I'm the cheesy mother that's going to post about how much she loves her son. I talk about how much I love Madelyn all the time. Heck, I was worried I couldn't *possibly* love anyone as much as I loved her.

But I do...I love you to the moon and back.

And you've had a rough go of it in the past few months. You took me by surprise with that. You were so quiet and calm and peaceful and honestly, I think that's your nature. I've probably jinxed myself by typing that...but I do. But we had a rough patch of it about when you turned 3 months.

You'd been sleeping pretty darn well and were starting to coo back and forth with me. You were holding your head up really well. You would snuggle up with me at night and didn't need me to swaddle you. You were drinking your bottles so well and I was keeping way ahead of you (go me!). You didn't nap on a consistent basis during the day - but overall, you were getting a lot of sleep.

I wrote in your baby book (which I've been *terrible* about keeping up, I'm sorry m'boy) on the 13th of January that you were getting a bad case of cradle cap. By the time we went to Papa and Gigi's to visit, your scalp was just one big mass of ickyness and it was starting to come down onto your face. You'd rub your eyes till your forhead was raw. You were getting terrible spots on your body. You'd cry and cry. You wouldn't sleep.

And we couldn't figure out where my happy baby went! We went back and forth to your doctor's office (and she is awesome - you don't like her much because she is the self professed "baby torturer" by messing with your ears and giving you shots...but she's so good with you and with me too). At first, we thought it was an ear infection that was causing you distress and just normal cradle cap and possibly that you had eczema. I found out that your great grandfather had it - so that made sense.

We treated it and your ears got better, but nothing else did. It was getting worse.

So, I took you to a dermatologist. He is a very nice guy but what he had us do wasn't working and you continued to get worse.

Then, we put you on sensitive formula because your dad and I were starting to think maybe the gassiness you had (and boy did you have it) was really bothering you. That did nothing for you.

Then our dishwasher leaked and we had to have the house dehumidified. And things REALLY got bad that week.... And we chalked up the serious eczema to the dehumidifier. Only when they were gone, things didn't get any better.

Finally, we put you on soy formula. That didn't really help much, but when I put you back on breastmilk things got really, really bad. You cried non stop. It broke my heart. You were exhausted but you wouldn't sleep. I can see in your eyes during that period of pictures how very tierd you were.

So your pediatrician had us put you on a hypoallergenic formula and we took you to an allergist. The trip to the allergist was one of the worst experiences I've had as a mother. The allergist was great, but your skin was so blotchy we couldn't do a patch test. So, we had to draw your blood. Only, the lab we used wasn't specialized for children. I will never do that again. Never. You started crying when you saw the needle. I don't know how you knew, but you puckered up the second you saw it. Then, the tech couldn't find your vein and while I had to hold you down, she dug in your arm. I know how much that hurts as an adult. Having your scream and look into my eyes was pure torture. She found it just about the time I was going to deck her. I don't ever want to repeat that experience.

Turns out you have a milk protein intolerance and you're allergic to peanuts.

Nuts, my little peanut. I eat a lot of nuts. So, we're armed with the formula and an epi pen while I try to figure out what we're going to feed you instead of PB&J. I'm praying you're one of the 20% that outgrows it and we'll retest you at a year old and every year after that. I'm hoping I can use all the milk I have banked in 7 months....

After a week and a half on the formula, you're like a different baby. You're happy again. You're sleeping so much better. You are still a cat napper during the day and you wake at least one or twice during the night - but it's not every hour and half. It takes me awhile to get you down for good - but all in all, it's fairly smooth.

You still sleep in our room in your co-sleeper. I really don't want to move you. I will at some point, I'm sure...but I don't want to. I like peeking at you in the middle of the night. I like hearing you breath. I like kissing your head. You're already getting so big, I don't want to miss any of it. Your sister is not a snuggler - I'm hoping you're different and want to snuggle with your mama. I'm already looking forward to building forts in your room and Madelyn and you and I having slumber parties on a Friday when Daddy is at work.

You talk to me all the time. You coo and I coo and you coo back...it's precious.

You smile all the time....and now you giggle. You giggle when your Daddy talks to you. You giggle when your sister plays with you. You giggle when I squeeze your belly.

On your 5 month birthday, you really started rolling from your back to your tummy. You'd done it the first time at the end of February, but hadn't really done it again. On Sunday, you couldn't stop! Each time you would look at me like, "what in the heck just happened?!?!"

You've started reaching out for things with your hands. You love to chew on your "Mister Star" (it was your sister's favorite too). You are reach for the car seat toys I have above you. You LOVE to hold your bottle....the look in your eyes when it's coming at you is priceless....and you reach up for it.

You are starting to enjoy being put in the exesaucer. You weren't so sure about that at first, but you're starting to like it. I have to laugh though, the first time we put you in it at 4 months, you could bounce yourself up and down on the lowest setting. Your sister couldn't even touch the ground at the same age and setting. We had to put books under her feet. You've got the advantage of weight on your side.

You've started trying to scout yourself forward when you're on your tummy.

I love the smell of you.

I love to nibble your little cheeks.

I love that you're my constant companion. You think life is good no matter what we're doing, as long as I'm holding you.

I love the way you stare at your Daddy waiting for him to look at you and how you grin when he does.

I really wish we could bath you more. We don't because it's hard on your skin. I hope you love the water as much as your sister does. Sometimes I take you into the shower with me after your sister has gone to bed....you just need a bit of a water bath and you stay warmer when the room is steamy. I love how squishy you feel. You've got the squishiest baby thighs and tush.

You're starting to get really curious about what we eat at dinner time. We'll try solids soon and I can't decide whether to start you on oatmeal or sweet potatos. Your Daddy votes for applesauce.

I still keep you swaddled....I don't know when we'll break that. You fight it at first, but honestly, you rub your eyes till their just raw if I don't. I'm hoping as time goes on you'll get over that.

You've really started to interact with your sister.....she'll try to make you laugh and you'll giggle. This eggs her on and then she'll giggle...which makes you giggle even more. I love the sound of my children laughing.

I could stare at you all day long. Really, I could. Who wouldn't want to when you look at this face...

My Girl

2011-03-22T19:00:00.000-07:00

Where do you start when you're so far behind in updating your blog? There's so much to say about my babies that I don't even know where to begin!

I've been reading through entries where I've talked about Madelyn and I look at pictures from a year ago, much less from when she was born….she has changed so very much and grown so very much, it's just amazing to me and I just don't know where to start in telling stories or talking about her. She is such a little firecracker. She's got so much going on in that little head of hers.

So, I'll just do a brain dump of all the things I love about Madelyn or think, I need to remember this forever. Sit down, this is going to take you awhile…..

Every little thing she does is magic

Her independent streak grows daily (if I say stubborn, then I'm also calling myself stubborn since I'm the same darn way). Maybe I don't love this, and yet I do. It's constantly "Mama, me…me..me" and that's cute, unless it's bed time and I'm really trying to get her into her jammies because Will is losing it and I'm all alone. Then I don't love it so much.

She alternates between Mama and Mommy since she's started daycare. I love hearing Mommy, but I love it when older little girls say "Daddy and Mama" like a southern belle….so I can't decide which I want her to call me.

Daycare outside of the family has been a new adventure for her. The first week was TOUGH. She'd cry hysterically when I left. Stasha has been awesome though – on those first mornings, she'd call me later in the day to tell me that Madelyn was doing okay and had stopped crying pretty quickly. Now, a month later, she asks me in the morning if we're going to Stashas and when we get there, goes right to her. The other night, when both Jim and I were reprimanding her, she says, "Mama, Stasha GO!" Hmph!

We're getting closer and closer to potty training. She's very curious and talks about pee pee all the time. She'll tell me after she goes. She wants to sit on her potty chair but she's yet to make anything happen. We've had a few accidents if she's running around like a jay bird – and she'll announce it after the fact if I didn't catch her in the act.

When the moon hits your eye like a big peeeeeza pie, that's amore

She's still such a darn picky eater. She's no longer a teeny weensy thing –she's up to the 50th percentile, but it's still worrisome to me (me, worry? Nahhh) mainly because I really, really want to raise a healthy eater. I know, I know….it's my job to provide her a healthy meal, it's her job to eat it – but I still have a hard time sending a 2 year old to bed hungry. That having been said, she'll be up for 2 hours in the morning before she'll indicate she's hungry. If I try and get her into the highchair any sooner than 30 – 45 minutes after she's gotten up she'll revolt.

Her favorites include:

• PB&J sandwiches

• pasta and marinara sauce

• black olives

• cheese (cheddar particularly)

• apples (she says this all day long… apwuls pweese, apwuls pweese and now…Mama, mama, apwulsaaaas)

• bananas

• bread of any kind

• cereal (and particularly cereal with raisins or dried strawberries)

• turkey sausage

• green beans

• raisins

• cranberries

• mac and cheese

• hotdogs

• grilled cheese and tomato soup (for dunking)

• pears

• meatloaf (but not hamburgers or ground beef…weird!)

• ham (she also asks for this often…)

• black beans

• waffles and pancakes

• tuna fish on crackers (actually, she'll just eat the tuna fish off the cracker and ask for more)

• grapes

• chicken nuggets

• pizza (but pepperoni or Canadian bacon – hold the pineapple, she'll pick that off)

She loves to dunk things. We'll do French dips and she won't eat the sandwich so much as she'll dip the big sourdough bun in the sauce. If she sees ketchup or ranch sauce, it's game over until she gets some. She'll dip anything in them. Apples in ketchup. Pears in ranch sauce. You name it, she'll dip it. If it's food she doesn't like, she'll keep dipping and licking.

She drinks her milk out of her bowl (like her Daddy).

She is a water drinker! I don't even bother with juice. All day long it's "waa waa, Mama, waa waa".

We try really hard to just feed her what we're eating for dinner without offering her other options if she doesn't like it – but if it's something really out of the norm, I will give her a "back up" meal. That having been said, we now do "One bite of this for one taste of that". I'll set her meal before her with portions of everything and she doesn't get more of her favorites still she's tried everything or at least had a bite of her veggies.

She can climb into her own highchair and buckle herself in. I keep thinking we need to move her to the table. Not all of the adults in the house agree on that move just yet…she's rather messy still.

She's getting better and better with her fork and her spoon. She can spoon feed herself cereal and soup if she really, really concentrates. She still prefers her hands for most everything. I just don't know at what point I start cracking down on that.

She loves her hippo bib best. Seriously. A hippo. "Mama, no raaah (her word for lion…she has a lion bib), hippo, hippo!"

And she'll have fun, fun, fun till her Daddy takes her t-bird away

Watching Madelyn play is just good for the soul. I love to watch her figure things out and see what her imagination will come up with.

She loves to dance. She always wants to dance. She got a Dora the Explorer microphone that plays music for Christmas and she'll turn that on and hold it to her mouth like she's singing and march around and around. She holds her babies and dances them around. She *really* likes to dance with Mama and Daddy, which consists of taking our hands and spinning around in circles. She's always asking me to dance and I always oblige her. Jim always says, "You're a fly girl, you're a fly girl" (hello, does that date us or what?) and she'll shake her little tushie.

She has a new found fascination with being dizzy. She'll spin herself around and around (typically in her bed) and say, "Mama, dizzy!"

She loves to jump, which she can now do properly. She'll try to jump off of anything and everything.

She loves her legos and will build a single pile of them as high as she can get them to go and then knock them down.

She got a kitchen for Christmas and *loves* it. She's really starting to pretend, so she'll make us "dinner" and set plates and bowls in front of us and try to feed us. If you ask her what she's making, it's always "Peeda" (pizza). I think that's become her "go to" word for food. Everything is "peeda". Or pie. She's ever even had pie.

Along the pretending line of things, she likes to put her babies to bed, try to diaper them and swaddle them like I do Will. She'll put them into her baby stroller or her baby pram (she has both) and will say, "Bye Mama" and take off for a "walk" with her babies.

She loves play do and wishes we would play with that all.day.long. I've had to hide it because inevitably she'll ask for it five minutes before dinner. Or five minutes before bath time.

She loves to color. This is one of her favorite activities at day care. Thus far it's just scribbles but more and more the scribbles aren't just random chicken scratches across the paper, she'll actually color over something. She won't draw a circle if you tell her "draw a circle", but she does draw circles frequently. If you ask her what the same circle is over and over, she'll give you a different answer every time.

Madelyn loves to go on walks. She constantly asks to go on walks – whether it's pouring rain or sunny. She loves to be outdoors. She loves to walk to the park. She loves to walk up the steps at the end of our neighborhood. She wants to walk everywhere we go. Problem is, she doesn't want to stay with Mama and Daddy. We're working on that.

Madelyn is a total water baby – she absolutely loves to swim. We're in week 3 of her second round of swim lessons. She'll let me dunk her under water now. She likes to jump into the water and wants to do it without Mama catching her. She hasn't figured out yet that she can't quite swim. We've been to the King County Aquatic center a couple of times and we've been to the Federal Way Rec Center pool. The Rec Center pool is *awesome*. It's got a slide that is just Madelyn's size and she LOVES it. I've yet to be bold enough to take William and Madelyn at the same time by myself – I really want her to go as often as she wants to and I want Will to be a water baby too….but I'm nervous I couldn't keep them both safe.

My Little Bookworm

She loves to read. I could read for hours to her at night. Lately, she'll take a book for herself and look through it and grab a book and hand it to me for me to read to her. During the day, she'll pull book after book out and "read" through them (babbling to us). She also likes to read to William.

When books have big letters printed out on them she likes to point to them and say "twooo twooo twoo" while I say the actual letter name.

She loves all of her books – but these books she asks for over and over:

• Good Night Gorilla

• Just in Case You Ever Wondered

• Elmo Loves You

• I'm a Big Sister

• Gossie and Friends books

• The Please and Thank You Book

• Anything by Sandra Boynton – but specifically Moo, Baa, Lalala, The Going to Bed Book, Pajama Time, But Not the Hippopotamus, Horns to Toes and In between, Bob and Bath Time

• The Christmas Carol (seriously….she'll have me read this over and over. And who knew that in the original poem the reindeer's name was "Donder" and not "Donner". I thought it was a misprint at first)

Gibber Jabber

Madelyn doesn't talk as much as I'd like for her to – for her 2 year appointment I think I counted 60 – 75 words that she had said, but not all the time. That's on the low end of the scale….and I am sure it's due to her binky. We're working on that…

She does a lot of two word sentences and I know she understands much more than she says. I can give her pretty complicated instructions and she'll follow them (if she's in the mood  ).

In addition to those 60 – 75, she says:

1. One

2. Two

3. Three

4. Ouch (it comes out ahhch)

5. Owee (she uses this a lot lately)

6. Cow

7. On

8. Why

9. Pie

10. Rock

11. Whee

12. Water (wa wa)

13. Home

14. Help (Help please!)

15. Apple

16. Applesauce

17. Cat

18. Dog

19. Hot (she'll say this even if it's just a little warm)

20. Good Good Girl (it comes out gu gu girl)

21. Hippo

22. Now

23. Up

24. Go (this is often "Mama, Go Now!" "Mama, Go Walk!" "Mama, Go Stasha?")

25. Shoe

26. Sock

27. Cheese

28. Yellow

29. Airplane

30. Soup

31. Bowl

32. Ice Cream

33. Caillou

34. Eat

35. Pizza (Peeda)

36. Freda (Her Grandma Freda)

37. GiGi (Grandma Griffitts)

38. Guy (this is her word for anyone that seems scary to her. If she sees a witch in a book, she'll say "guy! Guy!". Lately she's taken to pointing at our front door and saying "Guy! Guy!". I didn't figure it out until we were looking at her Aladdin book and she pointed to the character Jafar and said, "Guy!")

39. Stasha (this is her daycare provider)

40. Purple

41. Green

42. Key

43. Pee Pee

44. Poop

45. Amen (it comes out Aaaa-meee)

46. Me

47. I fly (And she'll run around with her arms out saying "I fly, I fly")

48. Bee (for a bee)

49. Bee (for her Aunt Bree)

50. Drew (her uncle – only it's more like Dew)

51. Santa Claus

If you ask her what a cow says, she'll moo. If you ask her what a monkey says, she'll tickler her armpits and say "ooh ooh ohh". If you ask her what a lizard says, she'll stick out her tongue. She'll roar for a tiger and a lion. For all other animals, it's "eeeh eeeh".

Along the same lines as talking, she loves to sing. She'll follow me and do the actions for the Itsy Bitsy Spider, Head Shoulders Knees and Toes, I'm a Little Teapot. She loves when I sing the ABCs – if I start up, she'll go over to her ABC refrigerator magnet and push the button so it starts singing. When we're playing in the bathtub at night, she'll make her little fishy swim if I start to sing "Three Little Fishies".

Rock a bye baby

She's such a good sleeper! She rarely, rarely wakes up in the middle of the night. Now that we have a video monitor, I can see that sometimes it takes her a long time to fall asleep, but for the most part, she goes right down. Especially now that Will is here, she no longer wants or needs to be rocked. In fact, if he's being really fussy and we're alone, she'll ask to just be put directly to bed by saying "Mama, ni, ni" and pointing at her bed.

As of late, she pretends to go "ni ni" or she'll put her babies "ni ni". If we're alone and rocking, we go through the list of names she knows and she asks me if they're going "ni ni" (Mama ni ni? Yes Madelyn, Mama is going to go to bed when we're done rocking. Baby ni ni? Yes, Madelyn, Will is going to bed too. Daddy ni ni? Daddy is at work, sweetie. Nana ni ni? Yes, Nana is in bed. Gigi ni ni? Yes, Gigi is in bed. Papa ni ni? Yes, Papa is in bed. ) In our world, when it's her bed, everyone has gone ni ni ;)

Naps are a different story. At home she'll generally nap from 2 pm to 5 pm. I tell her its nap time, we go up to her room, straight into her bed and not a peep until I go in and wake her up at 5. At day care she rarely naps. I'm hoping that's just part of an adjustment. At daycare she's either on the couch or on a mat on the floor in the open. She still really does need that nap. "No nap" days are no fun by bedtime.

She's a night owl and does not like to be woken up early in the morning. If left to her own devices, she'd go down between 8:30 – 9 pm, be up at 8:30 – 9 am, eat lunch around 1 pm and down for a nap at 2. That was our schedule when Will was first born and I was home. If I have to actually wake her up instead of just going in when I notice that she's up (and she won't call out for me…she just hangs out in her bed), she's pretty darn cranky. The first 15 – 20 minutes of being up are always a good snuggle time. She's not too interested in doing anything but that and watch some TV.

She can climb into her crib, but she has yet to try to climb out. She just calls for me till I come.

By the end of February, she's stopped doing bottles altogether at night…we do a sippy cup of water that she'll hold as we rock and read. Then she'll say "All done" and put it on her night stand. Part of me is glad – but part of me hates to see the last of these baby things go.

When I rock her, she'll lay her head on my shoulder and run her little hand up and down my arm. I just love that.

She'll say her prayers with me at night by either folding her little hands into a prayer or holding my cheeks in her hands and trying to mimic what I'm saying. She finishes by saying "Ahhhmeee".

Brothers and Sisters

Madelyn loves her little brother. She is constantly stroking his head, giving him kisses, bringing him his binkie. Lately she wants to change his diaper.

Funny story: One day she decided *she* was going to change his diaper. So, she sat between my legs while I took his diaper off and started to wipe him off. She looks at his boy parts and then up at me like, "what the heck, Mom?!?!". So, I said, "those are Will's boy parts because he's a boy." She looks back down at him and back at me, then back at him and pokes him. This made Will giggle, so she pokes him again and he giggles again…. It doesn't phase her now – but at first she was pretty darn curious.

When we took William for his 4 month check up and she for her 2 year check up, Madelyn had her shots first. She cried and we calmed her and wiped her eyes. When it came time for William's shots, she looked over and him and saw what was about to happen and big tears sprung to her eyes and she leaned over and started trying to shush him before he even uttered a peep. My baby was crying because my baby was crying...how sad and sweet that is!

Sometimes Madelyn doesn't love Will. When she's really needing some love she'll pat the swing and say, "Mama, BABY!" and want me to put him down so we can play (typically it's when she wants to dance). When I was on maternity leave, she really had a hard time of things in the morning. I always tried to get her up before I got Will up so we could have time together. If he woke up and started crying, she'd grab my hand and just hold it tight in her lap while staring at the TV as if to will me not to move. She really doesn't like it when Will cries, particularly at bedtime if we're reading a story. She'll try to shush him and give him his binky. She doesn't understand it when he doesn't calm down and she'll start crying. Those are the times that break my heart because I know that she really, really wants her Mama and she's not going to get as much time as she used to.

She doesn't like it if we get into the car. She'll say, "Mama, baby!! Baby!!" as if to say, "Hey lady, aren't you forgetting someone?"

She's always talking to him in her little gibberish and trying to make him laugh.

Now that he giggles, she tries to tickle him.

He watches her constantly – and it's just amazing when they look at each other and start interacting. I just love those moments.

That Face

Madelyn is just like her Mama – her emotions are written all over her face. She'll give me the side eye when she's trying to avoid me. She and I get into some serious locked eye battle of wills. I'm still winning. For now.

She has an infectious laughter and she now tries to mimic our smiles and sing songy voice when we talk to Will.

She will try to bat her eyes and tilt her head and grin when she wants us to do something.

Zoning

This is where I admit my kid watches way more TV than I thought I'd ever let her. Every time I see another parent talk about a movie their 2 year old has seen or a character they love, I don't feel like I'm scaring her for life quite so much.

But she does – she loves TV. And I do my best to always interact with her – we talk about what we're seeing and I try to pick shows that include dancing or doing things (i.e. The Wiggles, Monkey See, Monkey Do). Her favorites include:

• The Wiggles

• Monkey See, Monkey Do

• Caillou

• Sesame Street

• Chuggington

• A Bee Movie (During the movie she'll say, "mama, Go, Bee, GO!")

• Santa Clause is Coming to Town

• Happy Feet (with a LOT of fast forwards over the scary parts)

• Madagascar 2 (with a LOT of fast forwards – and I have to say, this is a favorite for Jim and I…we quote it all the time)

• Merry Madagascar

• All 3 Tinkerbell Movies

Snips & Snails

2011-01-13T08:44:00.000-08:00

~*~ Edit: I wrote this over 2 months ago, with the intention of uploading some photos and posting. That obviously didn't happen, so I'll share it with you and try to keep up better with my blog~*~

I've never been very good at keeping up on Madelyn's Love Letters....and I suspect that now that I have two children, it's not going to be any better....

But I have thoughts rumbling in my head I wanted to put on paper, so to speak. So here's my first love letter to William.

What are little boys made of?
Snips and snails, and puppy dogs tails
That's what little boys are made of !"

My dearest little William. I'll admit when I looked at the sonogram screen and realize I was growing a boy, I was flabberasted. It's not as though I didn't realize it was possible...it just didn't seem likely. Your dad makes girls! So I was floored. And overwhelmed. Girls I know. Girls I can deal with. They are sugar and spice and everything nice...and being a girly girl myself, I'm all over that.

But boys? What do I do with a boy?

And everyone kept telling me I'd get it. And truthfully, I didn't believe them. I didn't ever believe I could be nearly as good a mama to a boy as to a girl.

And you know what I've realized in the last 20 days? You and me? We're going to be like peas and carrots....because while Madelyn is my emotional mini me and I will spend a lot of time teaching her how to harness her spirit to serve her well....you, you were put on this earth to ease my soul.

Already you are my peaceful child.

Already when I hold you, I feel confident and accomplished. I don't stress. I know what I'm doing and I'm doing a good job.

Part of that is me. I've been around this block and around it with a newborn that gave me a run for my money. She cried. A LOT. She was difficult to sooth. Her tummy hurt her all the time and that made for a very stressed out mama.

But you? Okay - so you don't suck very well and we're pumpng exclusively again. But this time, God was kind and 3 pumps a day gives me enough milk to feed you for the day and a bit more for the freezer. That's not how it was with your sister or I wouldn't be doing this again.

You? You're calm. You love to just lay in my arms and watch the world, when you're not sleeping that is. And that sleeping bit? It's a blessing. Your sister didn't do much of that as a newborn or a young infant and it nearly drove your mama to the brink of insanity. But not you....you sleep. Not always when I want you to - but enough that I can sleep a bit too.

I cannot express in words how in love with you I am, my beautiful, perfect little man.

Catching Up

2010-10-30T16:49:00.000-07:00

It's a good thing the people that read my blog (if there's anyone still left....) are actually my friends, since I haven't posted since March and it's now October and things have changed around our house.

Namely, we had a baby.

Our son, William Warren, arrived about a quarter to one in the afternoon on Thursday, October 21st.

So much has happened in the last 7 months, I don't even know where to start!

Madelyn is definately a toddler. She is completely my child and knows her own mind. She loves to climb and play with her blocks and her puzzles and she especially loves to read. She's getting to the point that she wants to read to me, even though she has no idea what she's actually reading, she tells me all about it.

She loves to play outside. LOVES it. She always wants to be on the go (except for the car seat part...she doesn't like it when she has to hang out in her car seat on the way to being on the go).

She just recently started saying a few phrases and doesn't talk a ton. I take that back, she does talk a ton, just in her own Madelynese.

She LOVES her baby brother. All she wants to do is kiss him. And give him bear hugs. Big bear hugs. That usually send Mama's heart racing because she hasn't figured out how to be gentle.

And our dear baby William, whom his sister affectionately calls "dub-a-dub-a-dubya" ("W"). He's sweet and quiet and finally gaining some weight. He was a little on the smaller side and has a posterior tongue tie, which makes it really challenging for him to feed at the breast. So he's not for now. For now, I'm pumping. We're going to see if we can overcome this situation with the help of our doctors and our lactation consultant. If not, then we have to make some hard decisions, because being an exclusive pumper isn't in the cards this time around. It's too much for me and not fair to my daughter or my son - they need a happy mama who has time to love and play on them. Not a mama stuck on a pump for 5 - 7 hours a day.

But thus far, he loves his car seat (unlike his sister), he is content to sit and be cuddled (unlike his sister....even when she was his age), so we're hoping he's our C A L M baby. I spell it out because I don't want to jinx myself.....

And for now, I hear him calling. It's dinner time, for both of my kids.

Wow. Did I just say that? I have kids. Plural.

My kids. Those are two little words I wasn't sure I'd ever say.

No Words

2010-10-30T15:47:00.000-07:00

Show Off

2010-04-08T10:54:00.000-07:00

I have to show off some photos of my girl....

We won a nusery photo contest and had a wonderful photoshoot....here's the outcome:
http://www.whimsicalphotodesign.com/1310

25 Years!

2010-03-23T15:10:00.000-07:00

I remember this time....I was in Korea and I was coming back from tutoring a group of high school students. It wasn't late, per say, but it was winter and it was dark. I'd taugth this class for a friend, while they were out of town and it was in an outlying neighborhood where there wasn't as much English and not as many foreigners walking around. I'd gotten myself turned around and I was lost. Most neighborhoods in Seoul don't really shut down - unless you're in their version of the burbs. Which I was. So....here I am, millions of miles from home, lost beyond all lost, not able to find sign to the bus station or subway and everything seems pretty darn shut down.

And I started talking to myself....I literally was thinking:

I am my father's daughter...and if my father can hump jungles in Vietnam and come out alive, I can find my way back to the damn subway

I know it sounds weird to jump to Vietnam and jungle humping. But that's what I was thinking....I'm my Dad's daughter and when I have to be, I'm tough as nails. Sure, I'm my Mom's daughter too - and after the tough as nails part passes, I cry like a freakin banshee...but in the thick of it, I put my head down and forge ahead like the bull my astrological sign says I am.

So at this point, ya'll are asking yourselves "Why is Heather telling us this story and what the heck does it have to do with her two little words for the day?" No, I haven't lost my marbles. Well, maybe I have, but that's beside the point. I'm thinking that because I realized in a conversation with my Dad recently that this is the legacy our family has. It's the example he and my Wicked Step Mudder (coined by my niece, who at the age of 3 didn't understand much past Snow White and thus started calling my Step Mom my Wicked Step Mudder) have provided for us kids.

And it's their 25th Wedding Anniversary today and I want to toast them and let them know that long after any parties die down and life goes on...that's what they've left us. And that's what I hope to teach my daughter. And that means something.

So, I don't have a flowery card for them and I didn't send flowers (because our credit card information got stolen and I'm currently naked without a credit card....because I would have!). But I do have a gift for them....and that's the gift of legacy.

Because, you see, I now understand how hard it is to be the new wife.

I understand how hard it is to have kids in your home that are not ones you helped raise from infancy - and thus, when they're being turds, don't remember when they were cute babies in your arms to help temper the turdiness.

I understand how that can strain a marriage - because other couples have this lovely honeymoon phase, without kids and mortgages and soccer fields and group dinners on the fly, to cement their relationship.

And they get to grow into a family that moves at the pace of 1985325 miles per hour.

I also now understand how it feels to have a mortgage - and worries about keeping a roof over your family's head. That's not exactly romantic.

And I understand how, despite the fact that it's just a sock, a sock left in the wrong place can drive one to want to commit murder.

And I understand that relationships can be won or lost, once conversation (or lack thereof) at the time.

I understand that love is an action verb, not a state of being.

That marriage is 99% what you make of it and 1% that crazy gober head lust part. That lust part is important - but at 3 in the morning, when you're up for the 87th time with your new infant, lust isn't going to help. When you're planning your 93 year old mother's funeral or being told you have breast cancer again, lust isn't going to help.

And that's what my Dad and my Stepmom have given us. Their marriage has not been easy, by any stretch of the imagination. They've faced obstacles I don't ever want to face. And, I'm sure there are times they wanted to quit. And sometimes, in some instances, that's okay....sometimes you've tried everything else and done what you can do and it's the healthiest thing to do. But a good majority of people mistake doing what's healthiest with doing what's easiest and when the tough times come, pull up stakes and run in the other direction.

That's not what my Dad and Connie have taught us.

They've taught us lots of crazy, fun stuff too. I'm one of the few people I know that thinks pork and beans are always used in taco meat. And a few too many trips to the Oregon Coast have left me with an unnatural affection for Alabama. And I will never accept that there is any chowder but Mo's chowder.
But 35 years from now I don't want my grandchildren to think I was cool because I know all of the words to Roll On, I want them to think I was cool because I taught them to dig in and keep going when things are tough.

Because that's what my parents taught me.

Dad and Connie

I may be a Mama, but I'm never too old to love my Daddy

Papa and Gigi and their Carson Boy

Sisters, sisters...never were there such devoted sisters

Carson holding his baby who he's "going to teach stuff to"

Carson and Uncle Jimmy

Just look at Madelyn...you can see the wheels turning..."who are you and what are you doing with my Carson boy!"

Proud papa and his boy

Big Sissy!

2010-03-22T08:05:00.000-07:00

It's hard to believe it's been 8 months since we've seen Jordan....time flies when you're busy raising a toddler! Big sister came home this weekend, one of her best friends (also named Jordan...go figure!), is moving in with Jordan and her boyfriend in Florida.

What an exiting time for them...to be young, with your whole life ahead of you and a world of opportunities. They're excited and it's fun to watch them be excited and remember those first years of young adulthood....the sense of adventure and freedom.

So - Jordan and Jordan are heading out this morning, driving cross country to Florida (all in one drive, because at 20, neither of them can rent a hotel room. They can get married, have babies and be drafted for war....but don't let them rent a hotel room!). What an adventure!

On Saturday, we had the family over to see Jordan and spend time together. Madelyn was too busy running around like a chicken, following her big cousins round and round and round the pool table (literally....we had a stream of children playing chase around the pool table....Madelyn didn't get the "tag, you're it part", but she did get the "chase" part and she thought it was great fun), to really make much notice of Jordan. Jordan was notice worthy, however. She just keeps getting more and more beautiful - as if that's even possible.

We're so proud of her - she's working so hard, doing well in school and just got a promotion at work. Smart, smart kid, but we've always believed that of her :)

We have pictures - but they'll have to wait since they're still in the camera. I know I've said that alot lately....but we've had some busy times in our house. We're catching the moments, just not having the time to upload them.

We have a good reason for being busy - we're busy cleaning out our spare bedroom for a new house guest. My mom is moving to Washington! We're all so excited, we just can't stand it. Okay, Madelyn doesn't really understand what's going on, but she sure does love running around Nana's now empty room. Mom has talked about moving in the past and the timing was just right for her to make the move. So, she'll be staying with us until she figures out where she wants to live. I think it's going to be fantastic to have Mom be able to spend some quality time with Madelyn and it sure is going to be nice having an extra set of hands in the evenings when I'm alone.

The other noteworthy item....this weekend missy had her first professional photo shoot! We won a photography contest and the prize was a photoshoot with the photographer, Susan Berman, that was holding the contest! We know Madelyn is adorable, but it's sure fun to hear others say they think so too. More on that to come when the photos are available.

Oral Explosion

2010-03-17T19:49:00.000-07:00

Boy....when my girl decides to do something, she does it!

Tonight she really started talking up a storm!

She said:

bye bye
ball
Papa

All for the first time that I've ever recognized! And we all know that it doesn't count unless Mama says it counts.

Bye Bye
When we were leaving my Sister in Law's house, Jenni and I kept saying, "bye bye" in an attempt to get her to wave. As Mads and I walked down the porch, she said, almost in a whisper, "bye bye". I went running back to Jenni's to tell her that she'd said "bye bye". We tried it again...and of course she didn't say it until Jeni was out of ear-shot. Then, in the car, she starts screamin at the top of her little lungs, "bye! bye! bye!"

Ball
Once we were home, she started playing her ball. It rolled away from her and I asked her "where's your ball?" And she pointed at it and said, "ball!"

Papa
Every night when I'm getting Madelyn ready for bed, we look at her "Who Loves Baby Book". It's a plastic book that has pictures of my family inserted in it so that she can learn to recongize their faces, even though she doesn't see them as often. She started paging through it tonight while we were putting on her jammies and while she was on a picture of my sister Bree, I said, "where's Papa (my Dad)"? Sure enough if she didn't page through the book and find a picture of my Dad and say "Papa, Papa". I tried it again, turned to my brother Drew's picture and asked her "Where's Papa?" She did the same darned thing.

We're on our way now.... walking, talking little Miss! Next thing you know, she'll be reading and writing!

365 Days

2010-03-16T10:08:00.000-07:00

It's been a lot longer than 365 days since our little munchkin came into this world....but all I could think of leading up to her birthday and since was that she's been with us for 365 days.

For 365 days, I've been someone's mom
I've rocked her to sleep at night 365 times
Either she's woken me up or I've woken her up 365 mornings
And in that time, I must have kissed her a half a million times, because I kiss her 1000s of times a day
For 365 days, I've worried and sweated and laughed and cried and giggled and snuggled something more important than myself, something bigger than I've ever been a part of -

And it's been nervewracking
And overwhelming
And tiring
And joyful
And silly
And touched me so deep in my soul that, at the molecular level, I feel different.

For 365 days I've been someone's Mom and I thank the Lord that he's given me that opportunity because it's been the most amazing thing that's ever happened to me.

Ever.

Things in our neck of the woods have been the same, but different. Every day, we get up, go to work, come home, make dinner, play with our girl for the precious moments we have with her, then we go to bed. Rinse. Repeat.

The weekends pass quicker than I can even say. The more independent Miss becomes, the easier it is to get things done around the house....but I still have a hard time doing "things" when she's awake. When she's awake, I want to be playing with her and enjoying the time we have, not doing laundry and cleaning rooms. So...the house stays a bit on the cluttered side and the list of projects grows. Such is the life of parents of a toddler, I guess.

Madelyn's baby book stops doing a month to month check in at 12 months...which is really sad, I think, because she changes so much month! Now she's *really* beginning to make new discoveries and learn new "baby babbles". Her firsts are far from over! I'll continue to fill it in as we go for the things there are left - but I'll have to start keeping track here of the things that she's done.

At the end of February, she got four more teeth, all on the top. They've just broken the skin, but I can tell when they're still bothering her, because she gets so very cranky. She drools so much, I'm amazed she's not completely dehydrated all of the time.

She's also started Hi-5ing. Actually, she likes to smack both Mom and Dad on the head - and we've tried to teach her to do Hi-5 on the hand instead. We also take her hands and run them gently on our face and say "gentle, gentle"....which works for a few minutes, but then she goes back to smacking and giggling. We've got to keep working on that.

On the 11th of February, she waved "bye bye" for the first time. She hasn't done it much since, but recently started doing it again. Never unprompted, but she's getting there. She's always a little too late. Today, we visited her Grandma Freda and we told her to wave "bye bye". She did wave bye, but not until we were out of the house and out of Grandma's line of site. Oh well....she's getting there.

On the food front, she's definately getting better. She can now eat strips of toast instead of tinsey weensy pieces. She's not a fan of meat, yet, but she did eat some turkey sausage this morning and seemed to like it. She's now eating scrambled eggs (yea!) and has had bits of very lightly spread PB&J sandwhiches. Sometimes she likes those, sometimes she doesn't. Her absolute favorite foods are still green beans (go figure!), cheese, any fruit (but bananas most of all) and pasta. Pasta, pasta, pasta. When in doubt, feed the girl some elbow macaroni in marina sauce and she's a happy child. She's tried a bit of breaded halibut and liked that. She likes tater tots and has had bit of all beef, kocher hotdogs. We keep trying avocados, but she's not a fan yet. She's eating Kix cereal as a snack from time to time and love Pirate's Booty, veggie flavor. Her absolute favorite breakfast is waffles. She could eat those for every mean, I'm quite certain.

She doesn't drink much from a bottle anymore - some in the morning, some at night and when I put her down for a nap. She's become an expert at the sippy cup and has started grabbing our cups and trying to drink from them. She has a little cup she plays with in the bathtub and is constantly trying to drink her bathwater. You'd think she was dehydrated, but she's drinking water or milk all day long.

At the end of January, I started putting hard soled shoes on her - and it was quite a site to see. At our cousin Si's wedding on the 31st of January, we put little patent Mary Janes on her and let her walk around for the first time outside of the house (any house, really...we don't carry her that much...we'd just never let her run around in public). She had a blast dancing the night away with her cousin Kaycee.

Since then, we've started taking her for walks - and that's now her favorite thing to do with her Daddy on weeknights, before I get home from work - and on the weekends. If the weather is nice, we go for a walk. Generally, we just walk around the block since the County built a water wall separating us from the River (hallelujah...they finally caved and built a wall surrounding our entire neighborhood!!!). It makes getting to the park and greenbelt along the River a whole lot more dangerous, since we'd have to walk along the River road for quite a ways. So, for now, we keep it to the neighborhood unless we drive down the road, past the wall, to the parking lot for the park and get out and walk there

She's quite the daredevil when she's walking. She often go full steam ahead running down the sidewalk, which makes her Mama *very* nervous. She's taken a bit of a tumble, not much - just enought to have to catch herself on the sidewalk...but it's going to happen, she's going to take a header at somepoint. I just hope I can keep it together when she does.

She *loves* to play chase with her Daddy. With me too, but Daddy is so much better at tumbling around with her than I am. She'll start chasing us, then we'll turn around and chase her back and she giggles and runs as far as her little legs can take her. All it takes to get her started is peeking at her around a chair or a corner and she's off chasing us. She loves to try and tickle our feet if she can catch them and if either of us is laying on the ground, she's trying and climb on top of us, giggle the entire way.

She and I took a quick trip to Idaho in February to see my folks. We didn't spend much time with my Mom as she'd just been here for Madelyn's birthday. We stayed at my Dad's house so she could visit her Papa and Gigi, her cousin Carson and Uncle Drew and her Auntie Bree. She had a grand ole time - and while she was there, Gigi and Papa got her her very own table and chairs for tea.  She didn't quite get the concept of tea (but just give that time, I'd guess the next time we're there, she'll be all over the adorable tea set), but she did get the concept of crawling up into the chairs and sometimes onto the table.

Since then, she's becoming a crawling critter. She tries to crawl up just about everything she can. She's tried to crawl onto the coffee table, but we've successfully kept her off of that, for now. We bought her a big soft chair for the living room and she crawls up into that and watches a few moments of Sprout TV (no lectures about screen time before 2, sometimes it's the only way I get a chance to make dinner...) or to read her books. She crawls into her mini rocking chair in her bedroom. She crawls onto her rocking horses and rocks herself. She crawls up the stairs if we're not careful to close the gate. She tries to crawl into her high chair, but it's a tad too high for her yet.

She's also become quite the reader. She'll sit and look at books for the longest time. She is constantly bringing them to us to read to her. Her favorite at the moment is "Milly Moo the Crazy Cow" (a touch and feel story about barn yard animals hiding from their friend Milly Moo in case you were dying to know). She has always hated diaper changes, but these days if I had her a book, she'll let me change her diaper pretty smoothly while she reads. Apparently reading on the toilet starts that young <>

When she brings a book to us and wants to sit on our lap, she does the cutest thing. Starting about 2 feet away from us, she'll turn her back to us and back up, looking over her shoulder, till she's hit our laps, then she sits down. I feel like I should be saying "beep beep beep" just like a semi truck backing up when she does it.

She is really starting to understand us. If we ask her to get her ball, she'll get it. If we tell her to throw it to someone (and she's in the mood), she'll throw it. She'll get her babies and her binkies on command. When we say, "Let's go for a walk!", she'll head for the door and wait for us to put her shoes on. At night, Jim plays with her while I cook dinner. When it's time to eat, he'll say, "Get in your chair" and most nights she'll head straight for her high chair and try to get in it. She has started signing "More Please" and will make that sign whenever she's hungry. She's done it a time or too when her Dad or her Grandpa Ron have been bouncing her (which she loves), but generally she does it when she's hungry and all through dinner till she's full. Her universal sign for full is to start dropping her food on the floor, but she is starting to get "all done". She'll sign it when we say "all done" - but she still doesn't exactly understand what it means.

A funny little story about her "more please".... Recently her Auntie Jen (who watches her) and her Auntie Jessica took all of the Clark cousins to Walmart for some shopping. It was getting close to Madelyn's (or, as Kaycee calls her, Mad - o - win) lunch time and nap time and she was starting to get cranky. Jenny set her down to walk in the produce section and Madelyn ran over to the onions and started signing "more please". This tickles me pink, since Jimmy is always teasing me about how many onions I put in food. Looks like I've got a second vote on loving the onions!

Yes, she does understand quite a bit. She understands that the remote is not for her and doesn't like it one bit. She understands that the phone is not for her and doesn't like it one bit. She does carry her little phone over her shoulder like she's talking on it and it's quite adorable. She understands she's not supposed to bang things on the TV and that it makes her Daddy quite upset when she does (so, of course, she keeps doing it).

She understands when we're reading at night that bedtime comes next and somestimes she wants to cut to the chase and go straight to bed. She rarely cries when I put her down now. Rarely - but she does get ancy when we're reading and just wants me to put her down.   She's not much for rocking and cuddling unless she doesn't feel so hot or she's super tired....which is why I still sneak into her room every night and pick her up and rock her. I'm not quite ready to give that up just yet. Luckily, I haven't destroyed her very wonderful sleep habits.  She is still sleeping through the night from 7:30ish to 7 am, unless she's sick.

She's still a big Daddy fan. At night, she knows that when we come out of the bath, we look over the railing down into the main room and her Daddy will be there waving at her and throwing her kisses, so every night she calls out as we come out of the bathroom "Daaad, Daaad" - even if he's at work and not there. If she and I are playing in the living room and he's not with us, after a while she'll go to the bottom of the stairs and call out "Daaad, Daaad". She's always looking for him.   Last weekend, Jim was doing quite a bit of yard work and she would just sit and watch him out the back window. Every once in awhile, he'd take a break and come talk to her at the window. She *loved* that. When he'd go back to work, she'd start crying - and I was never sure if it was because she missed her dad or wanted to go outside....both are some of her favorite things.

Her other current fascination is jumping and bouncing. We still have some balloons hanging around from her birthday. They're in a pile in ther corner. She'll dive into them and sit on one and bounce herself up and down on them. If there are pillows lying about, she'll move them, one by one, into one big pile in the middle of the room and jump and roll around in them. Lately, shes' taken to putting her little yellow step stool in her room right next to her big "Lotty the Ladybug" pillow, climbing up onto the step stool and then doing her version of jumping (which is really just her squating and standing, then falling forward) into Lotty.

It's pretty funny to watch, that's for sure.

It's been a long time since I posted - and it's nearly 11 pm and I've yet to make our lunches for tomorrow and get us ready to go...and I haven't even added pictures - so this posting will have to wait until tomorrow.... That's me - always behind the 8 ball and loving every minute of it.

**edited note...three days later, I still haven't had a chance to add pictures, so I'm just going to post this and try to add some pictures another night....because if I don't, I won't start blogging little fun stuff, like the fact that last night Madelyn started signing "eat" instead of "more please" when we told her to get in her high chair...***

New Year

2010-01-08T13:39:00.000-08:00

Wow...one post in the month of December. My head apparently wasn't in the blogging game!

So - let me give you the highlights of December:

Madelyn is not just walking, she's running.
She is not so into being spoon fed anymore. but doesn't have enough teeth to chew. This makes for some interesting dinner times.
She's very independent, unless Auntie Jenni or Mama are around...then she wants to be HELD. That is unless we're changing her clothes or her diaper - then it's a no go.
She is starting to put together that Mamamamama is me and Dadadadadadada is Jim - but she hasn't yet put it together that it's just Mama and Daddy.
She loves to DANCE (thank GOD....with her father's blood running in her, I was worried....damn non-dancer. My next husband is going to be a dancer. And I only say this because I tell Jim when he kicks the bucket I'm marrying an cat loving, liberal, chef who loves to dance. I really shouldn't tempt fate with comments like that...I am so blessed with such a wonderful husband. If his worst fault is that he doesn't like to dance, I'm doing okay.).
She's down to one long nap a day, most days. If she naps, it's a wonderful day. If she doesn't nap...well...notsomuch.
Despite the waterfall of water coming out of the child's mouth all day long, she still only has two teeth.
I was able to be off with her for three weeks - and that was a blessing and a curse, because I'm dealing with major MWS (Madelyn Withdrawl Syndrome) and MTOSD (Madelyn Turns One Soon Disease) issues.
She points at EVERYTHING and won't stop until I tell her what it is.
She had her first sleep over with Cousin Sydney.
She got dressed up and went to work for the first time. Okay...it was a baby Christmas party....but she looked professional, by damn.
She met a kitty cat bigger than George at my Chiropractor's office. No one was injured in the taking of these photos, for what it's worth.
She loves to look at pictures and is starting to point people out, thus asking their names over and over again.
I had my first Christmas in the last three years that I wasn't sick, pregnant or sick of being pregnant.
Jim was on a wonderful route that spoiled us rotten because he was home before Madelyn got up and didn't have to leave again until my bedtime. This month isn't panning out to be the same, unfortunately.
Madelyn started blowing kisses, even if she has no idea what she's doing.
Madelyn made it to midnight on New Year's Eve. Her grandparents did not. My how times change.
Jordan turned 20. Let me say that one again. Jordan turned 20. Holy CRAP. I am the step-monster to a 20 year old. When did *I* leave my 20s?!?!?
We cheered BSU on to a BCS bowl victory over TCU. Okay, we weren't in Arizona, but I bet they could hear Madelyn and I from the stadium. Take THAT stupid BCS. NCAA Football playoff system, anyone? And yes, if my daughter gets to watch TV, it's either Rockford (blame her father for that one) or college ball.

Other than that, what can I say? I'm in love with my daughter, I'm in love with my husband and more days than not, I'm in love with my life. What more can one ask for? Okay, I know...I could make a long list too...but I'll take what I got unless you have a winning Powerball ticket laying around you want to send my direction.

Now....if I could just get over the fact that my daughter is turning one in a week.....

On another note - the county has decided to put a water wall surrounding our entire neighborhood, thus separating us from the River. Hallelujah!!! Never say never...but it looks like this year won't be the year we flood.

I've updated our Shutterfly Site with tons of cute shots - but here are just a few teasers....

Santa, baby...

2009-12-16T08:04:00.000-08:00

I am seriously behind (what's new?) in posting pictures from Halloween and Thanksgiving...I know...

But this last weekend Jim and I took Madelyn to visit Santa for the first time at a local nursery who'd arranged to have this fantastic photographer there for mini sessions.

I just got the shots and my heart is melted all over again....

My mom sewed the little dress that Maddy is wearing. It's amazing to have such a talented Nana...this is seriously heirloom quality. Maddy did really well with Santa - she didn't cry at all!

Find Him

2009-11-30T20:49:00.000-08:00

Among all of the wonderful things I am thankful for this Holiday season...the list is endless. At the top of it, however, is my appreciation for those who serve and protect and my sincere and profound relief that if my husband has a bad day at work, he's not likely to be shot.

With that in mind, let's find this guy. He left 4 spouses to mourn their soulmates and 9 children without Mommy or Daddy to tuck them in tonight.

Bastard.

Walkin Gal

2009-11-22T21:12:00.000-08:00

Welll, she's done it. She's started walking. Tentatively, for sure, but she's definately taking steps.

I've had a hard time capturing it on video, because everytime I go for the camera, she stops. Add on top of it, I don't know how to get the videos off our camcorder and there's been a serious lack of footage.

This morning I was going to take her picture and thought I'd try to get her walking on my little camera video recorder...and I got it!

I can't believe she's big enough to start walking!

American Child

2009-11-12T10:14:00.000-08:00

So....I'm sitting here working away (no, really, I was), listening to my Ipod, thinking about the ramifications of site limits and upload protocols and SharePoint when a Phil Vassar song came on.

And maybe because it was Vetran's Day yesterday. Or maybe because that now that I'm a mom, I'm such a sap it makes the "Very Independent Heather" want to puke, the words made me mist up.

It doesn't matter if you like Obama or if you don't (and for the record for my extremely conservative friends or my husband, I had high hopes and I'm increasingly becoming very, very disappointed so knock it with the "what do you think of him now" comments I can't seem to get away from).

It doesn't matter if you think that our economy is going to continue a nose dive or not.

It doesn't matter what your politics, what your religion, what your hobbies, hopes or dreams are...

Things are still better for us here in the U.S. than they are in Kabul or Baghdad or Mogadishu.

And I am sincerely thankful that my child was born an American one.

American Child
Lyrics by Phil Vassar and Craig Wiseman

I was ten,
I was thin,
I was playing first base
with a secondhand glove and dirt on my face
In nowhere, Virginia
Who'd ever figure that kid in the yard would go very far
It was 419 Lakewood , had no silverspoons
Just an old beat up upright that played out of tune
Now I'm singin' and living the life that I love
And when I count my blessings I thank God I was
An American child

An American child
'Cause dreams can grow wild
Born inside an American child

Seven pounds, three ounces, she's got my nose
And she's into my heart as deep as it goes
With a promise that's more than just someone's last name
Anyone's equal, in late August came
An American child

An American child
'Cause dreams can grow wild
Born inside an American child

My grandfather would have been eighty today
But in '45 he fell down beside an American child

An American child
Oh, an American child
'Cause dreams can grow wild born inside an American child
An American child

Funny Girl

2009-11-11T11:58:00.001-08:00

From the day they're born, our children are interacting with us.

Madelyn has been no different. However for the first time, Madelyn tried to make me laugh.

On Monday, I was fixing dinner for she and I and she started making these growling noises from her high chair. I look over, and she's growling at me like a little dog.

Then she grins.

So I laugh.

When she realized what she did made me laugh, she started giggling, then she growled again.

And I laughed again.

And we did this for a good 20 minutes.

How cool is that? My kid was trying to make laugh.

I love being a Mom.

Our Pun'kin

2009-11-09T20:03:00.000-08:00

Holidays are so much more fun now that we have a little one. They're WAY more work when you're the Mama, too....but it's so worth it.

This Halloween, Missy was a little young to really understand what was going on...and obviously we didn't go door to door, just to her various Grandmas and Grandpas...but it was so much fun just because Maddy is Maddy - and an adorable doll.

Knock, Knock, It's Me...Miss Ladybug!

Who needs candy, when they have a bink!?!?

Or grandma's walker?!? That's much tastier than candy!

On one of our last sunny weekends, before the Great Flood Prep '09 began, Jim and I took our little Miss to the local pumpkin patch. It was so much fun to watch her experience new things - she was quite taken with all of the pumpkins. She liked banging her fists on them...or putting them in her mouth. We decided to wait another year or two for the hay ride and the corn maze...but we had a fun afternoon nonetheless.

Idaho Girl

2009-11-06T07:25:00.001-08:00

Phones In Church

A man in Topeka, Kansas decided to write a book about churches around the country. He started by flying to San Francisco and started working East from there.

Going to a very large church, he began taking photographs and making notes. He spotted a golden telephone with a sign, which read "Calls: $10,000 a minute.." on the vestibule wall and was intrigued.

Seeking out the pastor he asked about the phone and the sign. The Pastor answered that this golden phone is, in fact, a direct line to Heaven and if he pays the price he can talk directly to GOD. The man thanked the pastor and continued on his way.

As he continued to visit churches in Seattle, Phoenix, Salt Lake City, Reno, Denver, Oklahoma City, and around the United States, he found more phones with the same sign, and the same answer from each pastor.

Finally, he arrived in Idaho, upon entering a a church, he saw the usual golden telephone. But THIS time, the sign read "Calls: 35 cents." Fascinated, he asked to talk to the pastor, "Reverend, I have been in cities & towns all across the country and in each church I have found this Golden telephone and have been told it is a direct line to Heaven and that I could talk to GOD, but in the other churches the cost was $10,000 a minute.. Your sign reads only 35 cents a call. Why?"

( I love this part...I love Idaho ............)

The pastor, smiling benignly, replied, "Son, you're in Idaho now ...You're in God's Country, It's a local call."

American by Birth - A Idahoan (even a displaced one) by the Grace of God!

Who Knew

2009-11-04T14:49:00.000-08:00

Who knew that in three short little years

This little family

Would include this little miracle?

Happy Anniverary to Us

Our World

2009-11-02T07:45:00.001-08:00

Binky Baby

2009-10-30T11:15:00.000-07:00

My baby is a binky lovin' fool. When we first introduced her to them (WAY before we thought we would...), we really had no idea how much she'd love them.

Some folks continually caution us to take them from her now. Personally, I don't have an issue with her loving them. We'll deal with the ortho issues if they happen. If. As her Mama (and thus the ultimate rule maker, besides Daddy, of course), I'm okay with her having a "transitional" object. She doesn't cling to a lovey all day long. If her binky is her lovey, fine by me.

At our Pediatrician's recommendation, we keep several binkys in her bed at night, so that if she loses one, she has many to "find". Consequently, I commonly wake her up to find a binky in her mouth and one in both hands. It's pretty darn cute.

Her favorite binky related game is to have one of us put the binky in our mouth and let her grab it with her own (which is also the best way to get a sloppy baby kiss). She's also quite fond of trying to figure out how to carry multiple binkys at once.

The lesson for my blog readers? If you're every watching our daughter, a sure fire way straight into her heart is to come bearing binkys.

Wha? Wha? Don't you be takin my binkys. They're MINE!

How many binkys can I hold? Two, three, ten???

I can stick them on the end of my finger too? SAH-WEET!

Lemme try!

Oh binky, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways....

Helpin Mama

2009-10-28T09:52:00.000-07:00

Lately Madelyn has taken a whole new interest in the laundry basket. This is what it looks like when a little Miss wants to help her mama fold clothes...

Let me just climb in here and see what we've got...

Wait...what I really wanted was out there...what do I do now?

DOH! Mama...you come help me!

Maybe if I chew on my shoe, Mama will buy me more. Hey, it works for dogs!

It goes like this, Mama....don't you know anything?!?!

Look at me mama, I can fold clothes AND carry my shoes around, I'm a multitasker!

Sand Man

2009-10-28T09:41:00.000-07:00

In case you were wondering what 60 sand bags looks like....

Enough Already!

2009-10-23T07:46:00.000-07:00

Jim and I went to the meeting King County had for our specific neighborhood last night. It wasn't nearly as informative as I was hoping it was going to be. The planner they had there has a great deal of experience in flooding issues, but is new to our area and had not even walked our neighborhood. So, after a period of general questions, it was more along the lines of "what do you think we could do to help mitigate the damage". Gee....how 'bout ya'll build a levy on our side of the river!?!? Say what? It's already been decided that it's more feasible to protect the other side and let ours flood? Great, thanks for the help.

One thing that did come up was the possibility of them doing a sand dump in our neighborhood so we could sand bag without having to make the trips back and forth to the more regional sand bagging facilities. Sand bagging is not going to do Jim and I a lot of good unless the flooding is very minor - there is no way we can sandbag around our entire home and keep the flood waters out. If the flooding comes hard and the river rises to the worst case scenario flood levels, the engineers have equated the strength and volume of the entire river at that point to 4 railroad trains stacked two wide and two high coming at us at 40 miles per hour. Nothing but elevation is going to protect you from that kind of power. The worst case scenario flood level is at 70 feet above sea level. Our home sits at 64. What we can do, however, is have sand bags ready to cover our air vents from the crawl space and the doors. That way, if it is just a foot of water instead of six feet, we could try to keep it out of the house. The garage would go, but the house might possibly stay dry.

The one other interesting piece of news we found out is that if we flood more than 4 to 5 times, the FEMA regulated insurance we have on our home will buy us out and turn our land into green space. Since the Army Core of Engineers say it will take them 4 to 5 years to fix the damn if (notice I said if) they get proper funding, realistically, it could be a lot longer than that. So...good news folks, we only have to flood 5 times and we're out for good. :::sigh::::

It's so surreal, making decisions about what you realize you're going to have to sacrifice if push comes to shove and what you're going to try and save.

But I digress (I know...shocking)....

The real thing on my mind this morning is the amount of literature and TV entertainment that seems to be coming my way lately in which children are either in harm's way or harmed themselves. The last three episodes of Grey's had children getting hurt or losing a parent. Same with Private Practice. Even the books I'm reading...the last two have had children or their parents put in very difficult emotional situations.

What's with that? I've always been a kid person and thus more easily affected by stuff like that, but now that I have Madelyn it just kills me. It can bring me to the "ugly cry" (thanks Oprah, I love that term) thinking about her being in a similar situation. On last night's Grey's, the major story line was about a young mother in for what seemed to be minor injuries. When they turned major, her very young soon was off to the side crying, watching his mama suffer. I can't even imagine Madelyn in that position.

It's enough to turn me off of my two favorite shows and stop reading for awhile. Since...we've got some packing to do and furniture to move, that's probably not a bad plan.

But in the meantime, hey Hollywood, lay off the kids for awhile!!!

Teaser Pic

2009-10-21T22:44:00.000-07:00

So....Jim has some editing of the shots to do and we've got a busy weekend ahead of us, so I don't know when that will get done.

But in the meantime, I couldn't not post this adorable picture - edited or not.

Heavy Heart

2009-10-20T21:15:00.000-07:00

Remember that Green River Flooding I mentioned earlier today? I just left a planning meeting for our neighborhood in which city officials came to talk to us specifically. Things do not look good for our little group - especially our house.

At the end of the meeting, as I was looking at the projection lines and I pointed out our house to one of the gentlemen there, he said, "ma'am, you need to prepare for the very real possibiity that your house will be under 4 -5 feet of water at some point this winter".

Remember that sandbagging I mentioned? Scratch that, I'll be up the hill and as far away as I can possibly be.

Stupid Shutterfly

2009-10-20T12:46:00.001-07:00

I have a love/hate relationship with that site.

For whatever reason, if I add more than one album post, it screws up the previously posted album.

So I'll have to parcel 'em out to you one day at a time.

Phooey.

September 2009 - Boise Idaho

2009-10-20T12:38:00.001-07:00

Click here to view these pictures larger

Catchin' Up

2009-10-20T11:24:00.000-07:00

Man....life has been a little hectic in the last two and half months. If I ever thought I was busy before, this motherhood of a (now 9 month old!?!?!!) is a whole new personal high in the busy department. I truly, truly do not know how working moms of multiple children manage without a nanny or a maid.

And honestly, I don't even know where to start....

Work has been insanely busy - and it's good to be involved in an exciting projects - but working 65 hour weeks when you're also trying to keep up and home and with your baby girl makes for one tired, stressed out mama. And one dirty house (though my hubsters has been a champ about helping out). One neglected blog. Many, many neglected friends (whom I'm hoping understand, since most of them are working mommies themselves). More than a handful of neglected relatives (who I hate neglecting the most, after Jim and Madelyn). Dying house plants. A Weight Watchers plan that is just that, a plan, not an action. And a long list of personal to dos. Oh - and a computer that died and has now been replaced (which adds more to the "to do" list....Learn Windows 7, get computer set up). Happily, though, we released the system I've been working on for two years (TWO YEARS!) and thus far (day two) it seems to be working very, very smoothly.

Madelyn....my littlest munchkin. She is growing so quickly I just don't know what to do! It's exciting and makes me sad all in the same breath! She's definately not a tiny baby anymore (though she is tiny...she just had her 9 month appointment - she's in the 25th percentile for height, but only 5th percentile for weight. She is still my long, lean baby. Go figure). She's absolutely her mama's daughter - she is a VERY independent girl. Very. And I applaude that. Unless we're talking about changing clothes or diapers (which is something she hates the most - she does NOT like not being in control of her body). Then...it's not so helpful to have a very indpendent girl.

She's ----->thisclose<------- to standing on her own and walking. Since our family vacation to Idaho in September, when she really started pulling herself to standing in earnest, she's been practicing those skills on the couch - and she can now walk around the entire edge of the coffee table if properly motivated (by toys, not food....which is good in the long run - but completely unlike her mama). She's started on finger foods - and not just puffs. She's moved on to Veggie Bootie (a hit), cheese cubes (a REALLY big hit), sliced fruit (the soft kind, bananas, pears, etc), pasta (not a hit....which just floors me), hamburger (a hit at first and now...not so much). We keep experimenting with things we eat that we can start feeding to her.

She's very talkative - especially when she's doing something she doesn't want to do (like letting her mama change those diapers).

She's completely mobile. No more army crawling for her....she's been full on crawling since September and can scoot around pretty darn fast. She's much rather have us carry her, which I think goes to the independent thing, oddly enough. Down low she can't see what's going on. Up high, she can survey the action and decide what she wants to do next - and then, by golly, we better get her there to do whatever it is she wants to do!

She cuddles her lovies (though she doesn't want to take them with her during the day), she is lost without her binkie (and I'm not ready to deal with that anytime soon....I'm okay with it for the near and far future) and her Daddy is still her absolute favorite thing in the world.

She's sleeping through the night (yeah!), though I'd be lying if I didn't say I wished she would sleep well in bed with me. I'd have her in there every night snuggling away. However, being the every independent girl she is, she actually sleeps better in her crib. In her own room. Far from her mama. The mama who is alone most nights and imagines wicked people breaking into the house and stealing her adorable baby. I really do read too many dramatic stories for my vivid imagination.

She had her first serious cold and fever that turned into an ear infection. It wasn't as bad as some of my friends deal with...but I will say that one feels pretty helpless when they're trying to soothe a sick baby. I don't envy anyone who has a seriously sick child - it has to be absolutely heartrending.

And she's still got the most amazingly beautiful smile I've ever seen. It just lights up my whole world.

Around the house, Jim and I have been trying to prepare for the eventual flooding of the Green River this winter. If you've never been to my house, you might not know that our house is about 500 feet from the Green River, give or take 100 feet. We're holding out hope that it's not going to be bad as the Army Core of Engineers have been been warning it will be and that, at most, we're talking messy streets or sewer back ups. But when major players in the Kent Valley start building flood retaining walls around their businesses, you have to pay attention. So, we've purchased flood insurance, are making plans for what we'll do when word comes we need to evacuate, starting to move our irreplaceables to the upstairs, and knowing we need to clean out the garage (because if the garage floods, but the house doesn't flood, cleaning up icky chemicals would be a hazard - especially with a baby in the house), and thinking about what I'd do if word came in the middle of the night that we had X number of hours to evacuate and Jim wasn't around. Part of me would want to sand bag my little brains out and part of me says Do Not Pass Go, Do Not Collect $200. Proceed immediately to in-laws with baby and clothes and formula in tow.

As much as I'd love to do some remodeling and have insurance money help pay for that....the reality of such a clean up effort on such a global (or rather, neighborhood) scale is not something I care to deal with.

And on a sad note...for those of you who've known me longer than others....I finally had to let my little boy go. And it tears me up just saying that. George was my best friend and constant companion for the last 15 years. Not having him around the house at night, when I'm alone has been really, really tough. I'm a fairly independent person myself. Except for at night. I really like some companionship at night or my imagination goes in directions that are not comforting. Not having him great me at the door when I come home is surreal. The entire experience is just surreal. I keep feeling like he's just hiding from me and he'll show up in one of his favorite spots at any time.

But it was time - even if I didn't want to admit it. Even if I wasn't ready and had been left to my own devices would not have taken him in, he was ready. The toughest part was that the week before hand, he was doing great. No messes. No sick kitty. Playing and romping just like his old self...with no idea what was coming. But it did come and it was over quickly, with him in my arms singing his favorite song to him. And my "cats are a pain in the butt and I'm tired of stained carpet" husband was sobbing right along with me.

I've often wondered what I would do when it came time. I've always feelt so guilty that I didn't stay with Cassie in her last minutes...that I couldn't man up and be a good kitty mama. I've felt bad that I didn't have a nice spot to bury her or the money to have her cremated and returned to me. So, I feel better that I could do that for George. I know that he's just an animal, as was Cassie, but they were both my best friends and companions during a time that my life was not so steady and I wasn't as stable as I am now. While I have absolutely amazing friends and a wonderful husband and a fantastic set of parents and sibiling, only George was with me when I was scared as a bugger on a plane to Korea and wondering what I was going to do, only George was with me during my worst breakups and new experiences. Only George remembers what it's like to drive across country in a car with all of your belongings (okay...Dad and Drew were there for that too). George kept vigil during some pretty intense all nighters getting thesis papers ready and craming for the next big test. George was there when I was so broke I had two jobs and no money to do anything but sit and hang out with my cat. So even when I felt like I was all alone, I wasn't. I had George. And now I don't - and I'm not quite sure how to deal with that sometimes. So, while I asked my in-laws if I could bury him on their (flood free) property, I'm just not ready for that. He sits in a little urn on our fireplace (at the suggestion of said "cats are a pain in the butt" husband - who still tears up when we talk about George). It's small enough that most people wouldn't even notice it. But it'll stay there until I can let go all the way.

Not having to deal with a geriatric getting blind and deaf cat is a bit of a relief in some instances (no more kitty litter is nice while I have a crawling baby) and I wouldn't want another cat until we're either done with babies or the next baby (who does not exist yet for the Grandparents reading the blog) is no longer crawling, mostly I just miss my friend. And I hope that some day my daughter is able to talk her Daddy into another kitty. Because going through life without a constant furry friend who loves you no matter what just isn't the same.

The next set of posts are going to be various pictures I've uploaded to our Shutterfly account...because I'm lazy - and the easiest way to post them is to do it via Shutterfly instead of loading directly into this post.

Enjoy the pictures :)

1 Minute!

2009-08-13T07:43:00.001-07:00

We're making headway, folks, we're makin headway!

Last night, I put little miss down, crying, as usual....and this isn't something new to our "sleep training", she's cried at bedtime since day one unless I've rocked (and rocked and rocked and rocked) her to sleep.

But last night, we put on her jammies (normal crying....I hate that :( She always cries when we change her clothes or her diaper), we rocked (no crying), and she started dozing. I stood up, carried her to her bed, we said our prayers, and I layed her down. Of course, the normal crying (Mama! How could you leave me here alone!!??!?!?!) ensued. But it lasted for 1 minute and she fell asleep. ONE MINUTE. Yahooooooo!!!!

And she's really starting to cuddle up to her lovies - it's pretty cute.

Now, if I could just get her to stop crying when we put on her jammies....

Zoom, Zoom!

2009-08-11T17:00:00.000-07:00

We have a baby on the move!

Hello, friendly Blog Readers...it's been awhile. And while I want to apologize for that -the reality is that I've been doing what mamas are supposed to be doing....working hard at work and taking care of the family at home. There hasn't been time to keep up the blog. And, our home computer is it's last leg, so uploading photos to anyplace is pretty much impossible. We're going to be buying a new system soon...but we're (read my husband) is waiting for Windows 7 to come out in October, he doesn't want Vista. So...for the time being, I don't have a way to share photos.

In the last few weeks, Madelyn has really made a lot of huge leaps. She is now a baby on the move! No more putting her in one spot and expecting her to be in that spot if you walk away for a minute. She's not full out crawling, but she's doing a pretty good belly crawl. And it's pretty amazing how far she can get on her belly. She's crawling under and around our coffee table, from her bedroom to her bathroom (if I let her get that far), all the way across our bed (so you have to keep a sharp eye!). We'll be childproofing soon - but in the meantime, we're having to keep a darn close eye on her!

Little Miss has also figured out how to pull herself into a standing position. She's can't get from lying down to sitting - but if she's sitting up, she can grab a hold of anything around her and pull herself on up. Which meant, it was time to put the crib down one level. Once she's sitting, we'll have to put it down even further...but for now, one level will do.

And speaking of cribs...our munchkin isn't happy about it, but she's now one of the "victims" of crying it out. I say that because those of us who use some sort of "CIO" method are often lambasted by the mothers who are into the more "attachment" style parenting. And trust me....I tried the "gentler" versions of teaching her to sleep. No one likes to hear their baby cry...at least, any mother with any sense of connection to her child doesn't like to hear that.

But when you haven't gotten more than an hour and a half worth of sleep in a row since the child was born and she's six months old, you start to get desperate. Not to mention that it's not good for your little one, either.

So...finally...we cried it out. And I must say, the first night I cried right along with her. But she's done really, really well. The first night (which was five days ago) she cried for half an hour and woke up once in the night and went back down within 15 minutes. Last night, she cried for 15 minutes and was up once for five minutes. She's starting to figure out it. It still completely sucks when I put her down. She cries as if I've physically hurt her...and I can't stand that...but I know she's fine....and within 15 minutes she's cuddled up to one of her three lovies and she's just fine.

I wish that she'd been one of those kids that would have taken to the gentler approaches, because all in all, while I'm a pretty good mix of "old school" parenting and "new age attachment" parenting. Jim and I both believe in instilling a strong sense of values, clearly defined boundaries, and as she grows, letting life teach her the lessons she needs to be taught instead of enabling her or coddling her. That having been said, I want to be there right by her side to guide her, encourage her, and kiss her boo boos. I've been reading "Positive Discipline" and it has some pretty cool ideas about how to do that - be loving and kind, but firm.

So...I'd have preferred if we didn't have to cry it out. She's my little baby...I don't want her to cry :( But, since she seems to be stubborn like her mama, at least she's catching on quick.

Now eating....eating is easy, peasy with this kid. With solids, at least. She still tends to be a bit of a grazer when it comes to the bottle....but with solids, she's a champ! In addition to the sweet potato, cereal and bananas (her favorite, hands down...) that you've already heard she's into, we've added carrots (loves 'em!), peas (doesn't love 'em unless they're dipped in bananas), green beans (again, only with the naners), pears, peaches, squash (she's so so on these, she'd rather sweet potatoes), apples, prunes, whole grain cereal, turkey (which she flat out won't take any which way...she just gags) and beef (ditto...seems we have a vegetarian on our hands).

We keep being ~~goaded~~ gently pushed into starting to add cheerios or the like to her diet by my ~~pesky~~ more experienced sister-in-law Jenni. I say this in jest because I'd be lost without Jen. She is definitely one of Madelyn's favorite people and she takes amazing care of our little girl while Jim and I work. But since she's raised three of her own and also takes care of her sister's kids (one of Jim's other sisters)...she's been there, done that and is pretty good at letting us know what to do next. And to our credit, we did offer Mads an incredibly soft piece of cooked carrot one night. But she just looked at us like we were insane and spit it out.

So it seems she's not ready for that. I know Mama and Daddy aren't ready for it!

This weekend Maddy and I are going home to Idaho for a family wedding. We're really, really looking forward to that. Or at least, Mama and the family in Idaho are. Maddy probably could care less, as long as she gets her naps on time, relatively, has lots of people to play with and it's not too hot.

After that, we'll just be enjoying the rest of the summer. All three of us will be going home to Idaho again in September, but other than that...we're just enjoying each day as it comes.

And quickly they come, when you're trying to keep up with a precious little munchkin.

This, Exactly.

2009-07-31T10:43:00.000-07:00

Read this....

(for my un-net savvy audience, click on the "read this" text).

Heat Wave

2009-07-28T07:41:00.000-07:00

If you're in or around the Puget Sound you may have heard, we're having record high temps - into the high 90s in the city and 100s in the outlying areas.

For a week.

In an area that doesn't air condition homes.

We put a thermometer in the munchkin's room last night....it didn't get below 80. Even at 4 in the morning. Even with all the downstairs windows open (which I never do. Never. One of my biggest fears is someone breaking into the house when Jim is gone and I'm there alone with the baby).

She and I took at least two cold showers last night, three the night before, just to get her cool enough to get her back to sleep.

If I won the lottery today, I wouldn't even leave town. I'd check into the poshest hotel with working A.C. I could find. Then I'd figure out what to do with my millions.

I'm thinking any big dollar purchases in the near future are going to include central air for our home....seriously....

Babies and heat just don't mix.

So tell me...what are you stay cool without A.C. when it's broiling tips? I've already tried the ice cube water bath behind the fan one....it didn't really help much. I'm curious what everyone else does.

6 Months!

2009-07-22T20:20:00.000-07:00

Time has gone so swiftly....it is hard to believe our little munchkin is 6 whole months old! Things have been moving fast and furious over the last month...work has kept both Jim and I hopping.

We has a wonderful first fourth of July with our little gal - and a visit from Nana (my mom). Nana and Mama took the muchkin out for her first trip to the zoo. She didn't care much about the animals, but it made for a nice little outing. The 4th also marked our little water baby's first foreway into the lake(s) her grandparents live on. We weren't surprised to see that she absolutely loves the water. She's always loved her bath...and the lake is one big bathtub her her. Luckily, she also has an aunt and uncle with a pool....so she's constantly in the water.

Here are a few videos we've taken - enjoy!

Our Swim Monkey

Sittin Up Baby!

Ready Set...I'll Be Crawling Soon

Maddy Month by Month - 6 Months

2009-07-21T19:28:00.001-07:00

Click here to view these pictures larger

Maddy Month by Month - 5 Months

2009-06-30T07:12:00.001-07:00

Click here to view these pictures larger

Sweet Taters!!

2009-06-29T23:53:00.000-07:00

Things have been pretty hectic in our neck of the woods.... It seems like as soon as we get home, it's nearly bedtime for the munchkin and then bedtime for Mama, since the munchkin still hasn't figured out how to sleep through the night. Such is life with a baby... and since she's our little miracle, I'm not complainin'.

Work has been fantastic, but very, very busy. So, when I'd normally take time to eat (and write a blog) during my lunch hour, I'm on the phone and muting myself so they don't hear the crunch, cruch, cruch of my lunch. Which is no biggie, but the blog has fallen to the wayside.

In the last two weeks, as you saw in the video, we introduced cereal. I'm tickled to say she's up to three foods! Cereal, Sweet Potatoes and Bananas - all of which she loves! We haven't decided what our next will be - so I think we'll hang with these three for a week or so.

We're looking forward to the Fourth of July holiday. Not only does Mama have a day off, but Nana will be here to visit us! We haven't seen her since March, so we're really, really looking forward to her visit. And we're hoping the weather holds and we'll get to let Miss M wear the VERY cute swimsuit that Gigi sent to us (thank you Gigi!!!!!!) It might be her first toe dip into the lake.

Recently, we did a photoshoot with all fo the cousins (minus the littlest, newest one, since it was too cold out and minus Miss M's older sister, since she's in Louisiana). Daddy took the pictures and they turned out pretty swell. It's a good lookin brood we have.

The pictures in the next post document all of our fun :)

Father's Day

2009-06-21T06:00:00.000-07:00

My dearest love...

This is not your first Father's Day. You've been an amazing father for years now. But this is the first Father's Day that you are daddy to my little girl. Words cannot do justice to what I feel when I see you with our little girl. There have been times, I know, that you weren't so sure you were up for starting all over again. Having a baby is hard work. You knew that, I didn't.

And every time you love on her, I fall a little deeper in love with you. You are an amazing man with a well of compassion and love that you don't often acknowledge is there.

So...I will speak the words that are in our daughter's eyes when she sees her Daddy...

I love you

And truly....God bless the broken road that lead me straight to you.

Munch Mouth

2009-06-18T07:12:00.000-07:00

I have a five month old. A FIVE MONTH OLD! How did that happen!?!?! She's getting so much bigger every day and I'll update with all of the exciting changes since our last little monthly update soon...

But I wanted to share this video of her very first attempt at cereal :)

Holy Roller

2009-06-17T22:32:00.001-07:00

Thankful Thursday

2009-06-11T12:00:00.000-07:00

I am most thankful for these two munchkins

So...she wasn't so happy while I was recording this because she thought I was leaving her for the night. But she's cute nonetheless...

And her rolling over...

I wish I could figure out how to embed. I'm doing everything my crafty friend Rebecca has taught me to do, but it only copies part of the code. ::::EDIT NOTE - I finally figured out how to embed and came back to this post to fix it....:::::

And, as usual, please excuse the ridiculous baby talk...my child's grammar is going to be horrible, but I can't help myself.

Tippy Toes!!!

2009-06-10T12:00:00.000-07:00

And no...I'm not talking about Seinfeld!

I said she's discovered her toes...but girlfriend can now get them in her mouth!

Last night, I was getting her ready for bed. This is always, always my least favorite time of the day. She reeeeeeeally hates the process and she absolutely knows what it all means and fights it pretty hard. Normal for most kids, but I have read that's even more the case for acid reflux babies. Yea us : We start by warming a bottle and taking it, a binkie, and a blanket in her room so we're all ready. I pick out her jammies and set them with a diaper on her blanket on the floor. Then, she and I run her bath so it's all ready. We get her undressed and undiapered (the part she loves - this kid so loves to be nekkid...) and then into the bath. After the bath, we get dried off (this is the time when she starts crying) and dressed. I used to give her a massage during this time, but after a month I gave up because she does nothing but cry during it. So...now we read a story (right now, she LOVES 8 Little Monkeys (you know...10 little monkeys, jumping on a bed...only with 8 for attention span purposes ;) ). She gets all excited when I do the doctor's voice. Then rocking and bottle and bed.

ANYWAY - last night I was throwing her diaper in the pail and wasn't actually looking at her. When I looked back at her, she had her toes in her mouth. I started to pick her up before I realized, "Holy crap, my child has her foot in her mouth - this is a first!!!" I promptly set her back down, buckled her down, and ran for the camera. Yes, I left my buckled child on the changing table. Please don't call CPS on me. I'll post pictures when I get around to downloading them.

In the last week, our munchkin has also figured out how to pull on her toys in order to make them "sing"/play music all on her own. It's adorable - it's like she's finally figured out that SHE can do what I've been doing for her for months!

She's also starting to put her own binkie in her mouth (if it's easily accessible)....she'll either reach for it with her hand OR (even cuter) if she's in bed, she'll scoot her head till she can wrangle her mouth around to grab it. She's clunky about it...but she's getting it done.

And - now that she turns over, she's waking herself up ALOT. She'll turn herself over in her sleep, wake up and not understand where she's at or what to do and start crying. I figured this out at naptime on Sunday.

I'd put her down fast asleep in her crib. 15 minutes later, I wanted to put her baby monitor in her room. I snuck in, quiet as a mouse, and as I was sneaking out, I heard her peep. I stood still, looked over at her crib and she was on her tummy, arms under her, arching her back and head peering out over the crib side. The minute she saw that I saw her - game over (and nap over).

I wanted to be frustrated, but how can you get frustrated when your baby is being cute and grinning at you.

Oh yeah, she's got me wrapped and she knows it.... Maddy 1, Mama 0

Thankful Thursday

2009-06-04T13:16:00.000-07:00

So a girlfriend of mine does a weekly post called Thankful Thursday...and it occurred to me that I haven't voiced what I'm thankful for lately.

Bear with me...the story has a point.

I've been a little down the last couple of weeks. I'm having a really hard time getting used to only seeing Madelyn awake and happy for an hour or two a day. Her poor little tummy causes her to be pretty cranky some days and by the time I get home, I've got an hour or so before I start the whole routine of putting her to bed. She's figured out what certain actions mean and she's not so hip on bedtime every night. She loves her bath, but she knows once bath time is over, we're going to start getting ready for bed and she fights it pretty good. Add into that the fact that most babies aren't so happy in the early evening anyway (my friend Kim calls it the witching hours - from 5 to 8 pm) and I don't get to see a lot of my happy, laughing baby.

Jim's work schedule has been crazy for the last two weeks and he has the same run next week so we have maybe half an hour of face time in the morning and half an hour in the evening. During that time, one of us is generally feeding Madelyn while the other is trying to get ready for work. Not exactly quality couple time. Heck, it's not even family time. It's rush time.

So, I've been feeling sorry for myself. Not liking the situation and just generally feeling down.

But last night was different.

Maddy was happy (yea!) and that allowed me to play with her *and* get some stuff done around the house. Granted, it wasn't much, but getting anything done feels like an accomplishment. Madelyn loves it when we dance, so while we were upstairs, I put on Carrie Underwood and danced with my baby to "All American Girl". While I was dancing with her, I was listening to the lyrics and overwhelmed at just how much I love this little person, how very precious she is to me....my little All American Girl. Despite the sleep deprivation, challenges of being the only one on baby duty all night long, tummy troubles and fussy babies, just how very, very blessed I am to have her.

So - today....

I'm thankful I have a job. It allows me to provide for my daughter, even though I'm away from her more than I would like.

And I'm thankful I have a husband with a steady job. If I were to loose mine, he would continue to provide for us and we'd be okay. Poorer than we'd like, but okay.

I'm thankful that husband is so helpful around the house and has started doing things outside of his comfort zone, like cooking dinner for us.

I'm thankful that husband loves me enough and is caring enough to mend fences when we're being snippy with each other because we're rushed, we're tired, and we are generally grumpy that we're not spending enough time together.

And....I'm so very thankful for my little All American Girl. She is so, so precious to me.

And finally, I'm thankful that God let me know the kind of love I've never known before....that of a husband who wants to build a relationship and a family, despite the challenges, and the love a mother feels for her child. It is both awe inspiring and humbling.

Maddy the Model

2009-06-02T12:05:00.000-07:00

Every month or two, I talk my husband into putting up all of our camera equipment, backgrounds, and lightening and doing a photo shoot with our littlest munchkin. It can be a bit trying, because baby's will only model for so long.... So it usually ends up being a two day affair.

Eventually, if we do it often enough, I figure she'll get used to it and we can get it done in less than two days. I'm excited about the nice weather that's here, perhaps we can start taking some "nature" shots with our baby out in the yard.

Below are a few of the latest taken two weeks ago. The rest are at: http://jimandheatherclark.shutterfly.com/babypictures

Love Letter #4

2009-06-02T12:00:00.000-07:00

My little tiny munchkin...

This love letter is a little late - and I'm sorry for that - but I've been soaking up every little bit of you I could for the last couple of weeks and haven't spent a ton of time with the computer. I started back to work this week and what an emotional rollercoaster that has been.

On the one hand, it's good. Some day you'll understand what I mean by that. I have a whole new bucket of respect for stay at home moms because it is SO not at all what I thought it'd be like. Having a baby is hard! Even one as cute, cute, cute as you are. You are absolutely, next to your dear old Dad, the person I love most on this planet!!!! However, being that your Dad works nights and I spend a good portion of my day all alone without help, I get lonely for someone who can help me with you... Or at least do the things that need to be done while I play with you. So...being at work is good! I so very thankful for my job, I like my company, and I'm happy to bring in money to help secure the stability of our family.

But being away from my baby is hard, hard, hard. Just look at you! I know I'm biased, but you're simply gorgeous and when you're feeling good, you are the most amazingly happy baby. Daddy is going to have to beat those boys off with a stick. Daddy says when you're 30, but I say you can date when you're 25. This morning, when I was done getting ready and needed to put you in your carseat to go, I spent a few minutes just cuddling you. Daddy had fed your your morning bottle and you'd fallen back asleep snuggled up next to him. Every cell in my body wanted to stay just right there. It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it because I absolutely hate leaving you. When you smile, you light up the room and I hate that I go all day without you smiling at me.

Some of the changes from your last love letter:

You've started giggling. Honestly giggling!

You love it when I pretend I'm going to eat you up and my hair tickles your face.

You love playing the "kisses, kisses, kisses" game. I come at you and say, "kisses, kisses, kisses!!!" and kiss your little mouth. You giggle and have started to reach up for me with a grin when I start saying "kisses".

You've found your feet!!!! You are grabbing them all the time now and it's so precious.

You've started talking ALOT and I love that sound.

You are SO close to rolling over from your back to your tummy. If you knew what to do with that shoulder, you'd be all over it. Scratch that....I started this blog post and then you went and rolled over for us this weekend!

You are still in love with your Daddy, but you've started to give up Mr. Star. You're much more into your jumper now that you're such a big girl. Mr. Star doesn't make enough noise for you. I'm not saying he's gone to the wayside, he's just not your favorite anymore. You also love your rings for chewing and a crinkle book for the same reason.

You've started to wrap your arm around my neck. Granted, it's just for stability when I'm carrying you around, but I'll take it.

You've *really* started to notice George and you reach out for him now. That is so much fun to watch.

You've also started to recognize that your room is where I put you to sleep - and you cry when we go in there, even in the middle of the day. I chalk that up to you wanting to be in the midst of things at all times (you're so like your Mama in that way). You just don't want to miss anything by going to sleep.

I'm afraid to say it outloud, but you're starting to go down easier at night. You don't necessarily stay down easily, but it's not as hard at night. I don't know if I'm just getting better at being consistent or you're getting better at it. Probably both. You still don't sleep very well, but Dr. Fasullo thinks that's because of your tummy. Some nights are really bad. The night before last you were up all.night.long. Mama got two fourt-five minute naps before having to go to work. I thought I was going to be dead the next day and actually cried at work (in the bathroom...no one saw me, thank gawd).

When I turn you on your tummy, which you don't like much for the afore mentioned tummy trouble reasons, you've started to try and put your knees under you to scoot. Maybe crawling is soon? Lordy me, I hope not just yet!

You still sleep in our room. Before I had you, I thought for sure you'd be in your own room by 3 months. Now I battle deciding when to move you into your own room. I'm so not there yet, I like you sleeping in your little co-sleeper next to me :)

You're starting to notice that Daddy and I eat food that isn't milk. I am holding off introducing any solids till we've got your tummy troubles under better control, but I know that's a sign for starting your baby on solids - that they notice what Mama and Daddy are eating. This is exciting to me and makes me want to cry in the same breath. Solids will be fun! But how is it that my baby is old enough for solids, you're growing up too fast. I know this is the lament of every parent....and it's so true.

And speaking of those tummy troubles - they're still around. Your tummy still hurts you and when you're having a bad day, my heart breaks. We've tried going back to breast milk and that hasn't changed anything. We've tried Zantac, that hasn't helped. We've tried rice cereal in your milk, that did nothing but make the spit way thicker. Dr. Fasullo has us trying Prevacid next...and we're going half breast milk, half Soy formula till we run out of the breastmilk in the freezer, then it'll be all formula. And I'm starting to wean on the pump. Working has made pumping that much harder - because I just don't get as much and anymore, I think it comes between you and I spending quality time together. And that's more imortant to me. Besides, you seem to be happier on Soy.

You're trying to hold your own bottle. You can't do it unless it's empty - but if it's empty, you can hold it. You get excited when you see a bottle, empty or not.

All in all...you're just a bigger girl. Daddy calls you his "big girl", but I remind him you're still a little baby. You may have grown a lot, but you've still only been around for 19 weeks. That's not very long to be saying you're a "big girl". I think I'll be saying you're only a little baby long you actually are a big girl. It's passing too fast for me and it's exciting and sad all in one breath.

Daddy and I took more pictures of you two weeks ago (when you actually were 4 months old) and these are some of those shots:

Is that you, Mama? Whachoo doing down there?

Daddy....What you doing with that thing pointed at me?

Get my feet, Daddy, get my feet!

You woke me up from my nap for this?!?!

Take me to the beach, Mama, I'm ready!

Baby Toys

2009-05-04T13:55:00.000-07:00

Miss M continues to learn more and more every day. She's been getting pretty good with her hands, which is always so fun for us to watch. Everything she does is fun for us to watch, but when she starts to act more and more like a person and less like a newborn, it's pretty amazing. Especially considering she's only been here for 14 weeks!

One day last week, I caught her being enthralled with the toys on her bouncer chair. She's stared at them previously, so I knew she knew they were there, but this was the first time I caught her reaching for them!

Of course, I had to get a closer shot of her....and by this time, she knew I was watching her and wasn't as calm. Apparently she does not perform on demand.

She's also started chewing on her rings. I don't think she's teething just yet - at least she isn't acting like it. She's chewing and drooling, but there's no fever and peevishness, nor do I feel anything in her mouth.

The most exciting new toy is Maddy's new jumper. She absolutely loves to stand on her feet. In fact, she gets pretty peeved at me when I get tired of standing her on her feet and want to sit her down or lay her down. She wants to stand, darn it! So, when we put her in her jumper, she just loves it! She can kick and stand, her two favorite things!!

She's pretty sensitive to light, I'm not the only one to notice this (so it's not just me being over protective Mommy) - so we got her a set of sunglasses. They adjust to her head, but even on the smallest setting, the band is still a wee bit too big. But that won't be for long.

And....all the playing wears a baby out and she's got to nap on Dad's lap.

Massage Technique

2009-04-30T21:52:00.000-07:00

So...I have a friend whose little boy is having a hard time with tummy troubles. I told her I'd video the massage routine that we learned recently in our baby classes. I've tried to email her the video, no go. I've tried to load it up to YouTube, no luck.

So...here's the video with hopes this works for my friend and she can watch it :) Everyone else, just enjoy the nekid bebe :D

Spring Baby!

2009-04-21T12:52:00.001-07:00

Spring has sprung in the Northwest! And so is my little baby!! She's growing sooo much, it's hard to believe that she's three months old, but when I look back at photos of her birth, I think so much has happened in the last three months, they've seemed like three years at times (I mean that in a good way :) ).

Madelyn rolled over for the first time on her three month birthday, but she's yet to do it again. We're still battling tummy issues and what to feed her. Breast milk seems to be doing okay, but she still throws up ALOT and has really bad gassy bouts that leave her crying inconsolably. We've tried rice cereal in her bottle on the recommendation of the pediatrician, but that hasn't helped. So, it would seem we're just going to be covered in puke till she grows out of it.

She's started a bit of a regular nap schedule (most days) - an hour in the morning and a couple of hours in the afternoon... I try to plan outtings around that, but mostly we just hang at home because we never know exactly when she's going to want to go down. If she doesn't get her nap when she needs it, we pay with some serious crying for the entire night. That's hard on Daddy and Mommy and Baby!

As promised, her three month "photo shoot". Jim hurt his back, so I was the one taking the shots, which is why they aren't as good :P The complete set is on our photo site (link is on the right hand side of the page ;) ) There's also a shot of our little bunny rabbit and one of her sleeping in her bouncy. That's generally how I find her sleeping if she's not swaddled. Spread eagle as best as a little baby can.

And....for those who don't get to see her every day - a video of her playing with her favorite friend, Mr Star.

Rockin Baby

2009-04-20T20:47:00.000-07:00

I just submitted Madelyn's picture to the very funny ICanHazCheezeburger site and thought I'd share....

Love Letter #3

2009-04-16T22:31:00.000-07:00

My baby, my baby, my baby....
You turned three months old today! (Or at least, when I started writing this...it may take me a couple of days to post).

And you turned over from your tummy to your back for the very first time tonight!!!! You did it over and over again when we were having tummy time. Daddy and I are so proud of you!
Every day you are a joy to us. Sometimes we're exhausted in that joy - but as your Doctor's nurse put it this week, you are a site for sore eyes. I just want to snuggle you up every second I see you.

This last month has been a big month for you. You went to Idaho for the first time. You did so well on the plane, I was really, really proud of you! You barely cried and were very good. The biggest problem was those darn TSA agents. They can make getting through security with a baby a little bit hard.

You played really well with your Nana and your Gigi and Papa. They love you so much...it's crazy. You met Auntie Bree and Uncle Drew and Cousin Carson. You and Carson really hit it off...you were mesmerized by him and he thought you were pretty cute.

We had lots of food challenges this month. You were having green poop (yes, I talk about your poop, but I promise I won't do that when you're older or in front of your friends) and the doctor thought you might be allergic to my breastmilk, so we went on formula. After four weeks, that didn't chance anything so we're back on breastmilk. I hope it works because there's lots of stored breastmilk in the freezer! It's hard work pumping all that milk. Someday when you have kids, if you choose to, there may be a different attitude, but right now there is a lot of pressure to breastfeed. I'm really sad that didn't work out for you and me, kiddo. It would have been a lot easier. I'm not always sure how long I can keep up this pumping. I feel like it takes a lot of time away from you and I playing together (or me sleeping when you're sleeping). But know that I sure did try and I've spent a lot of time trying to do what's best for you.

You've had a tougher time sleeping in the last week or so as well. I don't know if it's going back on the breastmilk or if you're going through a growth spurt...but you've started waking up again several times a night. Man alive, that's hard on Mama. It makes me one grumpy butt the next day. I'm working really hard to get you on some routine. I started reading Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby, but it stresses me out! It has me letting you cry it out for some period of time and I'm just no good at doing that. I can't listen to you cry and not respond to you - it just isn't in my nature. We're going to keep working on that...I worry about when I go back to work and how our routine is going to be. Heck, I worry about that in general. Daddy and I need for me to go back to work so that we keep saving money for a rainy day (and you'll learn in your history books some day that this a rainy period in our nation's economy), but I don't look forward to being away from you, early mornings, and not seeing Daddy as much. You and I will both have to get up too early....and we *love* Auntie Jenni, but it's hard for me to know she'll get more of your waking hours than I will. ::::sigh:::: Sometimes I wish that Mama had three of her...the one that works, the one that cleans house and cooks dinner, and the one that plays with her baby and her honey.

It's morning now and you're taking your first nap of the day - it came quickly after you woke up, only an hour and a half. Daddy just got home and I'm glad he doesn't work tonight so he can see you when you wake up. You just love your Daddy so much, you light up when he's in the room. You and he play really, really well together. When he talks to you and you're eating your bottle, you try and eat and smile at the same time. It's really quite precious, but then again, I think you are pretty precious!

I can't wait for you to wake up from your nap. I want to try some more tummy time and watch you roll over. I want to keep working on your hand coordination. You've gotten pretty good at playing with your Mr. Star if I put him in your hands. Just this morning when I read your Mr. Turtle and Friends book to you, you reach out when we got to the page with the crab. The book makes crinkly noises, which you love and each page has a different textured material on it. Mostly you just look at it while I read it to you (and I've got the darned thing memorized by now... "Swimming fish with shiny scales are fleeing from alarming whale. A lake's too big for whale to roam, that's why he makes the sea his home."). But this morning you reached out and ran your hand on the crab. Yea!! You really are growing in there!

You've started reacting when I put you on your changing table. I tend to change you there before bed and you've decided you don't like it so much. You still like your mobile, but it takes you longer to settle down and realize it's there. You haven't been enjoying your Moby wrap as well either. That might partly be because I use it more when you're awake and less in an effort to get you to sleep. I'm trying to get you to sleep in your bedroom during nap time. So, no Moby. You don't like being confined as much when you're awake. You're still not strong enough to hold your head up indefinitely - so I have to tuck you into the Moby tight. You don't like that as much as you like laying on the floor and kicking your legs.

And man...what a kicker you are. You have been since you developed legs in the womb. Kick kick kick! I think you're either going to be a dancer or a swimmer the way you're always moving those legs. When we put you into your high chair while we eat dinner, you kick the foot tray so hard, sometimes I 'm afraid you'll kick it off and fall right out. I've started strapping you in just in case! You don't like the straps so much - you don't like them on your car seat either. You are happy in either seat as long as you aren't strapped in.

This next month you should grow and grow! I can't wait to see what you learn next. As the weather gets warmer, we can take more walks outside and learn about trees and leaves and flowers. You're going to meet Auntie Lory from Canada and just a little after your fourth month birthday, cousin Brody will be here.

You are so precious, from your head to your toes, Mama loves just every bit of you. Thank you for coming to us and letting us love you. Please always remember what a gift you are...

Got Tote?

2009-04-08T18:35:00.000-07:00

My friend Laurell, aka Noisy Penguin, is giving away a free tote in honor of her new Facebook group. Check out her work (and the contest!) here: http://www.penguinbot.com/blog/view/56

NP makes amazing handbags - if you're in the market, you should *definately* check them out!

Spudette N' Friends

2009-04-07T07:11:00.000-07:00

I have a slide show of my spudette on her Idaho adventures here: http://cmd.shutterfly.com/commands/pictures/slideshow?site=jimandheatherclark&page=jimandheatherclark/babypictures&album=416

And....in an attempt to try my first video upload to my blog....here's two fun filled minutes of her playin' with her big cousin Carson:

Spud Land

2009-04-04T13:01:00.000-07:00

I've always loved to travel and have done it quite frequently, both for work and for business...

And I love kids....I have always recognized that it's got to be tough to travel with them. But I'll be honest, there have been times I've been on trips for work that I am on a tight schedule and I want everyone who doesn't know how to get through security quickly, how to get on and off a plane efficiently, or those with children to sit tight, let me get where I'm going so I don't miss my meeting, and then carry on about their business.

Seriously people, it's 2009 - so yes, you have to take your shoes off at the airport. Get over it.

HOWEVER... (you knew there was a but in there, didn't you)

My God is a funny God. Yes indeedy he is.... He made it work so that Maddy's first plane trip would be with Momma (you know....that certain Idaho born Momma with a pennance for worrying and for being totally type A stress case) and just Momma. No extra set of hands...just Momma. And Baby. And two ginormous bags. And a car seat. And a carrier. And diaper bag. And a breast pump bag. Am I forgetting anything? Oh, a big heavy coat. And a baby blanket. Yes, that's it.

First lesson learned: Taking a flight that has a pit stop in Portland, but takes off at a more reasonable time in the morning (like 9:30) is actually more preferable to the nonstop that leaves the airport at 6:40 in the morning because when you're trying to get out of the house with a baby and you *can*not*be*late* and you need two hours to get you and the afore mentioned list of crap through security, you're basically not going to bed the night before.

Trust, me, I know.

Mads and I went to be around 7:30 pm. I woke up again at 10:30 pm. Fed Maddy (who promptly fell back to sleep). Did my imitation of a dairy cow with a pump and tried to go back to bed. But being the worry wart type A stress case I am, stared at the ceiling until 1:15 - scared I'd miss the alarm and mentally plotting out the order of each task I had to accomplish before walking out the door... That little inner dialog went something like this:

Okay get up before Maddy does - pump first, then wash your pump parts, pack all the last minute pump stuff and bottles, double check the house for anything else you needed to pack, zip up the suitcases and carry them to the car. Feed George. Scoop the litter. Shower, do your hair and makeup. Wake up Maddy, change her diaper. Put her in her super cute outfit. Feed her with the one bottle you left out. Burp her, put her in her car seat and go.... Wait. Should I shower first? What if she wakes up. I can wear her through all of those other tasks but I can't wear her in the shower. Well...except for cleaning the litterbox. That moby wrap is good, but the last place I want to drop her is in the litter box. Damn...what order....WHAT ORDER?!?!?

So...when the alarm went off at 1:30 and I had last looked at the clock at 1:15....ugh : I did indeed get all of the tasks done - and I even remembered to get dressed somewhere in there... However, Maddy was sure to let me know that she did NOT appreciate being woken up at 3:15 in order to eat and get dressed. She howled the entire time. She howled all the way to Grandma Marilyn and Grandpa Ron's house, where we picked up Grandpa Ron. He drove us to the airport and dropped us off.

We managed to get our lugged checked without much hassle...and then headed to the dreaded Security Line. I thought we were off to a good start when Mr. TSA ID Checker Man waved me to the front of the line and told me to merge into the Family Line. I managed to get everything into bins, shoes off, and liquids and portable electronics in a separate bin. I managed to keep our diaper bag, pump bag, two plastic bins of shoes, coat, liquids and portable electronics, along with the stroller, which was now empty of one baby who was squirming in my arms, moving toward the x-ray machine. The week before our trip, I'd called the airport to see if I could go through security wearing Maddy in her Moby Wrap so that I had two free hands. I was told that I could not wear a carrier, I had to physically carry her through. However, friendly Ms. TSA X-Ray Lady told me, "oh darlin...next time wear your sling through x-ray with your baby. As long as you don't have a coat over it, it's just fine and much easier," as if I was a traveling nube.

Hmph.

Second Lesson Learned: Sometimes the TSA guys need to get a life....really....do I seem like a suspected terrorist? If I was a terrorist, would I be doing my best to blend in, not stand out like a store thumb? That being said, I need to find a mini bottle of everything baby related if I plan to travel frequently with Maddy.

On the other side of the scanner thingymambob, Mr. TSA Bag Checker Man decided to go through our diaper bag. All while I'm trying to get my shoes on, belongings gather, while not dropping Maddy. Suddenly Mr. TSA Bag Checker Man says, "Ma'am, you'll need to step to the side, I need to run a chemical test on this Desitin." Okay....fine....

As I'm standing at the end of the little shoot where your bags get X-Rayed, Mr. TSA X-Ray Wand Waver Man says, "Ma'am, I need for you to remove your belongings and continue past Security." And I said, "yeah and I need a multi million dollar winning lottery ticket or that stroller you're all so intently examining so that I can put my baby down on something 14 trillion passengers haven't touched so I can gather my belongings."

Wait. My bad, I thought that, I didn't say it. What I really said was, "I'd love to if I could get my stroller back, doh head". Okay, I whispered the last part under my breath...but still. The stroller was returned by Mr. TSA Bag Checker Man, along with my diaper rash creme. Mr. TSA Bag Checker Man did let me know that I was over the allotted number of ounces in carry on items. You see, my Desitin tube is 4.5 ounces and you're only allowed 3. However...where in the heck am I supposed to find a smaller tube? Am I supposed to squeeze some in an unmarked baggie so I don't go over, for Pete's sake? That Desitin, it's daaaaangerous stuff....I'm liable to hijack my flight.....

Back off people, head for the Caribbean STAT or I'll schmere Desitin on your a$$!

Third Lesson Learned: Maddy will get poop on her shoes every time if you change her diaper and don't take them off first. She does not understand that you are trying to keep her looking clean and cute for her adoring fans.

Nuff said.

Maddy did quite well on the flight - she only cried a bit as we were getting settled. I think the jostling around was tough on her. During the actual take off and landing, however, she was a dream. The toughest part of the actual flight was how tired my arm got! I was holding her cradle style for her bottle and hot dang my arm got tired doing that for nearly an hour! I understand there are safety issues in not letting passengers use baby carriers during take off and landing, but shoooeee I sure would have liked to have used it!

Our Papa picked us up in Boise - I think Maddy and he were equally happy to see each other. We spent the first couple of days at Gigi and Papa's house. Maddy played and played and played with her Gigi and Papa....and she discovered her fingers! Daddy had been diligently trying for two or so weeks to get Maddy to suck on her fingers. She just had no interest. But suddenly when she was playing with her Gigi, she figured it out - and man you just couldn't stop her.

And it was the cutest.thing.ever. Not that I'm biased or anything ;)

While we were Thursday we hung out with Papa while Gigi was at work. Thursday night, Auntie Bree (my sister) came to visit. It's been awhile since Bree held a baby that small - since our nephew Carson was born. Maddy re initiated her by puking all down her back.

Maddy - 1
Aunt Bree - 0

Friday, Maddy and I went visiting. We went to see Auntie Bree at Macy's (actually, Momma shopped while Auntie Bree showed Maddy off to every employee of Macy's). Uncle Drew (my brother) joined us during our shopping extravaganza as he works just across the street. He kept having to say, "I'm the uncle, not the dad".

We also got to visit with my Uncle Kent, Aunt Linda and their two girls Abbey and her husband Alan, and Andrea. It was such a *wonderful* visit. Maddy took quite a liking to the girls and her great Aunt and Uncle. Usually, my Dad's family gets together in huge groups and it's really hard to have nice one on one conversations for longer than a few minutes. It was SO nice to spend a couple hours with my cousins without a ton of people around. They are absolutely beautiful, intelligent women. Both of them are teachers and I think that the kids they teach are about the luckiest around. I really look forward to my next visit home and getting to see them again.

Saturday, Gigi and Papa invited some friends over and we ate good ole fashioned fried chicken. Since my dad has retired, he's taken over cooking....and low and behold, the man can cook! Seriously! He makes the best friend chicken I've ever had - and that's including my grandmother's fried chicken. NUM! Maddy got to meet some my parents friends and most importantly, her cousin Carson.

Carson is 5. He'll be 6 in September....and he's an absolute hoot. I might be partial, but I think he's one of the cutest 5 year olds on the planet. Maddy was asleep when Carson got there and he asked me if she'd wake up soon. He told me that when he did, he was going to teach her "something". When I asked him what he was going to teach her, he paused, put his finger to his chin like he was deep in thought, then said, "Today....today I'm going to teach her to walk". Later, Carson was look at her mouth and noticed that she didn't have any teeth...but she had "those things that hold your teeth in" (meaning her gums). Before he left, he couldn't give her enough kisses. He kept coming back for more. I think he likes her just a little bit.

Sunday we headed over to Nana's (my mom's house) for the remainder of our stay. My 92 year old grandfather and his wife Vivian came to visit Maddy for the day. Maddy was a little timid around Grandpa at first, it might have been his deep voice, but she soon warmed up. She liked Vivian right away....there's nothing like a grandma! We attempted a web cam conversation with my sister in Hawaii, but technology and a tired, wound up one year old cousin prevented us from having much talk time.

Monday it was just Nana, Maddy and Mommy hanging out in their pajamas. Maddy and Nana had a great day playing and snuggling and telling each other stories.

Tuesday, Maddy and I visited Gigi at her office for one last snuggle before we returned home while Nana was at work. We were also able to have dinner with one of my very dear friends, Janel and her partner Mr. Richter...now dubbed Uncle Mr. Richter. Maddy was quite enthralled with them and they, I think, with her. I do love my life in Seattle, but when I am able to spend time with dear friends that I don't see often, it makes me miss home even more.

Wednesday, we visited Auntie Bree at Macy's one last time. We intended to see Uncle Drew as well, but unfortunately he was very sick :( We went back to Papa's house so he could take us to the airport. The trip back was much less eventful, with the exception of the TSA gal who wanted to make me try and fold up my stroller to put through the x-ray machine instead of just scanning it all while I was holding my baby. Yeah...no, not happenin.

And we got all 334 ounces of frozen breast milk through security. This child better not have a milk allergy because I have a freaking ton of it saved up for her.

Maddy's had her first visit to Spud Land, Momma survived a week away from Daddy, Daddy survived without Momma and missed his baby like crazy...and life goes on.

Fantastic Idea!

2009-03-24T06:24:00.000-07:00

I'm on a local parenting board - I found this group of gals when I was planning my wedding. We planned our weddings together via the local wedding chat board and now are having babies together and keep in contact via the local parenting board. They're a wonderful reason and several have become life long friends.

One of the moms had a FANTASTIC idea! Instead of doing the iron on transfers that so many moms do for monthly photo ops, she does stickers! Talk about easy peasy! Instead of having to buy 12 separate onsies and ironing on the transfer, you simply take the stickers and apply to whichever onsies you want! That's so key for me right now. I have so little time, it seems, to simply put the thing on real quick before the photo instead of dragging out the iron is really key to me. And I don't mind saving money in having to buy 12 different onsies.

I have some for Maddy and I love them! You may have noticed them in her two month love letter. They're sooooo easy! And, the photos we're getting are so much fun. I highly recommend them to anyone wanting to do monthly photo ops or as a shower gift.

Her Esty site is: http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=6653837

And a shot of my precious in her two month onsie:

Easy Potatoes

2009-03-17T14:56:00.000-07:00

Being that I'm a purebred spud, I am always looking for things to do with my beloved potato. I'd been trying to figure out an easier way to have real (NO packaged potatoes for us, thankyouverymuch, that's sacrilegious for a girl from Idaho!!!) potatoes cooked/packaged/frozen for us to have on hand.

My wicked stepmudder (She's not really wicked. In fact, I'm rather fond of her) sent me this video link of Maryann, from Gilligan's Island, showing a handy dandy quick potato trick. Before I sent it on, I had to try it myself....I *hate* when people send on stuff that hasn't been tried and tested (or snoped or smokinggunned for that matter...).

So, today, while Miss M was napping (hello...her first good nap in DAYS), I gave it a shot. Much to my happiness, it REALLY WORKS!!! I'm going to use half of the potatoes I cooked for tonight's dinner. The other half I'm going to let cool then food saver and freeze! The next time I need some potatoes, I take them out of the freezer, snip the corner off the bag and boil. Voila...instant cooked and *real* potatoes!

So, if you'd like to get good cooked potatoes and skip the peeling part - give this a try:

<http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z4W0qIPJmoo>

Ohh...and my stupid funny for the day...

An Idahoan's version of porn:

Love Letter #2

2009-03-16T15:44:00.000-07:00

My dearest munchkin - you are TWO MONTHS OLD! Where did the time go? I can't believe you're already two whole months old! You had your two month check up with Dr. Fasullo today and you've grown almost two inches and you've gained two pounds, so you're 21.5 inches long and just about 10 pounds.

This last month has been a busy month for you! Your Papa and Gigi came to visit you. They absolutely adore you and it was nice to have them here! While they were here, we showed them around our little neck of the woods, took them to Redondo Beach for your first glimpse of the sound. We took them over to Grandma Marilyn and Grandpa Ron's house and to Grandma Jody and Grandpa Jim's house. We all went out for dinner and you really enjoyed the "fine dining". Everyone thought you were beautiful! But mostly, we just hung around the house and they loved on you as much as humanly possible.

We started visiting Auntie Jennifer more. I want you to be comfortable over there when I go back to work. I already know Auntie Jen is going to take wonderful care of you and you'll be just fine without me, but I like to think you'll miss me all day long and need to get used to everyone but me. It's a Mommy thing. While we were at Auntie Jen's, you got to meet Rachel and her two little boys Lucas and Josh. Rachel taught me how to use our Moby wrap better and that's been great! I've used it a lot more and you almost always fall asleep on my chest. Thus far, we've only tried two different ways of wrapping it, one with a cradle hold and one with your head on my chest. You like both of them!

We went to the museum with Grammy Marilyn and my friend Jennifer. Her little boy Holden was born just a few days after you and you two seemed to enjoy each other's company. You weren't much interested in the art, but then again, you're only a few weeks old ;) You did very well on that outing and didn't fuss much at all. We had our first public restroom changing and I didn't drop you in the toilet, so I was really proud of myself. Someday you'll understand that - how hard it can be to keep everything from touching the ground or any unclean surfaces, all while holding an infant in your arms. I'm not yet a one handed pro - so it's still challenging for me.

You also got to meet your future BFF Mikayla. You two really hit it off. When she cried, you cried. When you cried, she cried. She held your hand and petted you - it was really sweet. Mommy really loves Mikayla and her mommy Deborah, so she's glad you two are hitting it off. Hopefully you two will spend a lot of time together growing up.

You're growing so big, it's astonishing. You're already so long, you're starting to outgrow your newborn clothes. Not because you're too big in the tummy, but because your legs are getting so long! You're really holding your head up well. Not without wobbling some, but it won't be long that you'll hold it up all the time! You're a master smiler. You really light up when you see someone you recognize. Thus far, that list includes Mommy, Daddy and your mobile. You still love that mobile something fierce. Daddy and I call them your "friends". Your monkey friend, your birdy friend and your froggy friend. You looove them. I've got videos of you watching them I'll show you some day.

We're just starting to really play with toys with you. You don't hold on to anything just yet, but you're starting to smile when we shake your rattle. You love for us to hold you and put your feet on the ground so you can pretend like you're walking. In fact, you can stand on your legs and support your own weight pretty well. I think Daddy is right and you'll walk early. Mommy still hopes you don't. I want you to stay little for as long as possible.

You still have the cutest cough I've ever heard and when you yawn, I melt....it's adorable. You've got a whole range of new noises. You definitely cry to let us know you do not like whatever is going on - which is usually me changing you (you hate that - you like to either be naked or dressed), a dirty diaper, a request for another bottle, or you're just plain tired. Lately you've started "talking" to us. You grunt and make cooing sorts of noises. You don't laugh yet...I can't wait for that, I know it will be the cutest thing ever.

You and I have a night time routine. Some nights we take a bath. You like that, except for the getting dressed part. Then, we read the same three books every night: Guess How Much I Love You, Just In Case You Wonder, and Goodnight Moon. You usually take your last bottle while I read those to you. And more and more, you rest your hands on your bottle, as if you want to hold it. Little Miss Independent already. Then, we sing our nightly lullabies while we rock. Most of the time, you're asleep by the end of the lullabies and I take you to bed. You still sleep with us. If Daddy is home, I put you into your co-sleeper just so we all have enough room. But, if it's just you and me, I put you on Daddy's side. You'll stay asleep for maybe fifteen minutes then you wake up. You know I'll come get you and I usually put you in your swing while I finish up taking care of George, making milk for the next day, and tidying up. Then, we go to bed together. You still sleep best when you're right next to us. In fact, even when Daddy is home, you might start out in your co-sleeper, but you usually wake up fussy and end up in bed with us. I think we all enjoy that - even though Mommy wishes we had a king size bed instead of a queen size bed.

In a few weeks, we're going to visit Nana and Gigi and Papa. We'll get to visit Auntie Bree and Uncle Drew and Cousin Carson. I'm very excited to take you to Idaho, even if I'm a little nervous about getting us both on the plane. You take a lot of stuff!!

We've had some challenges this last few weeks too...you've been throwing up *alot* and your little bowels aren't doing what the should. So, we've had to put you on a special formula to see what you're allergic too. It's going to take us three or four weeks to figure things out and Dr. Fasullo, Mommy, and Daddy are still hoping it's a bug and that you'll be able to drink Mommy's milk again. I guess those bugs can take a long time to pass in little babies. But it seems more like you're allergic to milk. So be patient over the next couple weeks...we know you don't feel good and your tummy hurts you. We sure are doing everything we can to figure it out because it just breaks Mommy and Daddy's heart when you don't feel good.

My littlest, I just can't believe you've been here for 58 days. In some ways, it seems like it was yesterday that you were born and in some weeks, I'm floored by how much you've grown in such a short time. You're getting so big so fast. It's exciting but makes me sad too...I hate to see you grow up too fast - you're so precious to me, I just want to be able to love on you and snuggle you tight for a really long time!

Just to show how much you've grown, I've got three pictures comparing sizes:

When you first came home:

Your one month birthday:

You yesterday:

I love you little Maddykins - with my whole heart and soul. I can't wait to see what you have in store for us in your next month.

Worry Wart

2009-03-15T05:33:00.001-07:00

I come by my excessive worrying very, very naturally. My dad is a self admitted worry wart. He can worry with the best of them. He came by it naturally too - his dad was a champion worrier. Whether I had a great grandparent that taught my Grandpa to worry, I don't know...but I'd have to guess it's a learned trait - so the answer to that is probably yes. I've got a worry on my heart and I just can't stop thinking about it - so I thought I'd throw it out there for good energy or prayer, whatever your fancy. I know it's silly to worry about something when you don't have any answers, I know I just need to give it up to God and let go. But I worry - it's who I am...and I don't know how to do anything else right now.

Madelyn still has that green poo going on. Yeah, I'm worrying about green poo. Welcome to motherhood. Other than that, she seems much better. However...she's still got that green poo going on and that isn't normal. When we were at the doctor last week, she mentioned The possibility that this was the sign of an allergy to milk protein, which she's getting through my breast milk.

So, don't you know I googled that to read all about it. And aside from the green poo, she isn't exhibiting a ton of the symptoms. She isn't throwing up as much, she's not seeming as gassy, she's growing, thriving, no eczema that I can tell. She does get fussy in the evening, but most babies do - that's very, very normal from what I can tell.

But that darn green poo - the only thing I can find on the Internet that this indicates is an allergy to milk protein. And the way to handle that? Either she goes on a very special formula or I go on a completely dairy free diet. Either solution does not really sit well with me. I hate pumping - Lord knows I do...but I do it because I know breast milk is best. But to go on a completely dairy free diet? Geeeeez...could breastfeeding get any more difficult for us? Not only to have to exclusively pump, which is no walk in the park....it's hard work....but to have to completely change the diet of the household? Common!!! Someone out there give me a break already! Pretty much every casserole (of which there are many left) in my freezer has dairy in it. Nearly everything we eat has some degree of dairy in it. I'd have to relearn how to cook, practically - new recipes, new thought patterns. And honestly, that might be more than I can take. And dang it, I worked *hard* to get the freezer stash of milk I've got for her. I've got almost 200 ounces frozen, waiting for when I go back to work. Any mommy who's pumped knows that's a lot of milk. That's 7 full days of food for her. To throw it out? That's like pumping my blood and then washing it down the drain. It makes me want to cry to think about it!

However, the Mommy Guilt is STRONG if we just put her on formula. Part of me feels like I've tried hard enough to breast feed her and it's okay if I put her on formula...but part of me would feel reeeeeeeeeally guilty. Like I was taking the easy way out. Not to mention that kind of formula is massively expensive and there aren't tons of coupons going around for it. It sure would be easier to just feed her formula - no more pumping...but the guilt...the major guilt. The pro breast feeding movement has done a *really* good job of drilling it into our heads that breast is best and making us mommies feel uber, UBER guilty if we don't. Am I a total sellout if I decide that non dairy is too much for me? Am I being selfish? ***sigh***

And here's where my real worrying comes in....what if she doesn't outgrow it? I've had family members (well, only one that I know of) have a milk allergy. His was pretty severe and wasn't fun for he or his parents to deal with. I don't want my little girl to have to deal with that. I just want her to be able to be worry free and not be concerned that something someone feeds her is going to be harmful to her.

Her two month (two month!!!) check up is on Monday and her doctor will follow up on our visit last week - so I should know more about what we might have to do then. Jim is able to go with me, I'm happy to say. It's always so much easier when we're both at the doctor's together. He thinks of questions I don't think of and it's good when we hear things at the same time instead of them being filtered through my brain.

If you have a little bit of spare positive energy, send it my way. If you are a pray'er, please pray. I realize that in the big picture of things, this is a very small issue. There are lots of people that have way more to worry about than I do. That doesn't mean this is fun, though and I'd really like for this green poo to just be a bug she hasn't gotten rid of and not a sign of gastrointestinal distress of the allergic kind.....

More Time!!

2009-03-12T14:21:00.000-07:00

Thursday was a great day, which followed a not so great day.

Let me start with the great day news...
I'm now off work until May 22nd. YIPEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

I got word from my HR department that now, in the state of Washington, short term disability time (that you get when you have a baby) and FMLA (that you get when you bring a baby home, adopt a baby, need to care for an immediate family member or yourself) do not run concurrent - they must run separately.

What does that mean for me? Previously my company (and I) thought they ran concurrently and I was due to return to work on April 6th. Now, I'll be off work until May 22nd.

6 more weeks home with my little munchkin!!! I feel so blessed that I have a company and boss supportive of that time and SO blessed that Jim and I are in the financial position to be able to afford me being off. YIPEEEEEEEEE

Now, for the challenges of the two days. Little Miss has been having some odd colored poop (yeahhh, you're reading the blog of a new mom, we're going to talk about poop sometimes) and has a strong tendency toward gasiness and spit up. On Wednesday, about 2 pm, little miss started crying hysterically. Usually I'm able to calm her....but she wouldn't settle. She cried her little eyes out until she passed out at midnight. I went over to my in laws for dinner - and nothing any of us tried would calm her. I drove her around - no go. She drank her bottle, sort of, but threw all of it up. Ugh...poor baby :( :(

Usually she wakes up somewhere between 3 - 5 depending on when I was able to get her down wanting to eat and change. However, on Thursday, I was the one who woke up first, at 7:30!!!! I tried to give her a bottle and she didn't want any part of it. So, I let her go back to bed. This seemed a bit strange to me - so I called her doctor at 8. They agreed and we went in for a visit. The verdict was that it was either (a) a bug (b) the beginnings of colic (ohh, please no!) or (c) she might have an allergy to cow's protein and is reacting to it via my breast milk (ohhh, REALLY, please no!!).

We came home and she literally slept all day - which is completely unusual for her. She did wake up in the evening for a bit and was a bit fussy and projectile vomited her bottle onto me during Grey's Anatomy (apparently she thinks the Izzy storyline is ridiculous as well) and then went right back to sleep. She slept hard all night and woke up at 5 this morning for her bottle, but with a dry diaper that right now, I'm attributing to the fact that she projectiled her bottle before bed. We'll see...but because of all that, I'm leaning toward a bug. My poor baby...her first little bug :( :(

At any rate, we have her two month check up on Monday - so we'll be able to check back in with the doctor and see what she has to say after we monitor her for the weekend.

Let's all pray bug....and be shocked that my littlest is going to be two whole months old next week.

Got Art?

2009-03-05T17:38:00.001-08:00

Today was Madelyn's first adventure into the world of culture. She, along with her Grandma Marilyn, and my friend Jennifer and her son Holden ventured down to the Seattle Art Museum. Jennifer and I met on the local parenting/pregnancy chat board I frequent and happened to be due one day apart (she on the 19th and I on the 20th). Unfortunately for Jennifer, Madelyn came a few days early and Holden decided to hold out (sorry - I couldn't resist the play on words) for several days, so they're a week apart. Aparently Madelyn likes younger men. First Ryan, now Holden.

We started our day at The Olive Garden to partake in the Soup, Breadsticks, and Salad lunch. I do love me some Olive Garden Breadsticks...which I found were the easiest to eat because Madelyn was up the entire time and wanting her bottle. Holden, on the other slept like, well, a baby! I also had my first adventure in public restroom changing tables, which I'm proud to say I handled without any major mishaps. The baby did not fall off the table into the toilet and I managed to get her changed.

We then met up at the museum. Holden and Madelyn weren't much interested in the exhibits....except for this one. They both seemed rather fussy and in need of a bottle when they got a look at this one.

Jennifer and I agreed that this lady had obviously recently spent time with a Medela Pump In Style breast pump because they can't naturally look like that.

The SAM has several displays that are always there - and we were able to snap another picture of the babies getting a little culture while the docents weren't looking (we'd actually been caught the second time we tried to take a picture and asked not too....too bad we don't mind the rules and did it again when they weren't looking). Again, the kids didn't seem too interested in the art, but we thought it was worth commemorating.

For those that are history buffs, the musuem currently has a fairly cool special exhibit through the end of May; Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Hapiness featuring art from the Yale University Art Gallery. There were some pretty special pieces, including the original piece that is etched on the back of a two dollar bill.

Another great thing about the SAM - the first Thursday of every month is free...so I'll be paying attention to upcoming exhibits and try to catch them on first Thursday. Madelyn ain't done getting cultured yet ;)

Ohhhhh SHOES!!!

2009-03-04T09:38:00.000-08:00

How cute is this give away?!?! Grosgrain: Puss Ann Guest GIVEAWAY!!!!

Neat Giveaways!!

2009-03-04T09:35:00.000-08:00

My friend Rachel (of Moby wrap guru fame) has inspired me to be more frugal. Actually - I had been thinking of it and she's doing a lot with it, and has great links on her site.

ANYWAY - another friend had this link on her site....and free is frugal, so I'm excited to enter this contest: Grosgrain: Born 2 Impress GUEST GIVEAWAY!!!!

So Blessed

2009-03-02T19:16:00.000-08:00

Today I was reminded how truly blessed I am. I was having one of those days….Madelyn would just *not* sleep – and she didn’t sleep well last night, so I was exhausted to tears. Jim volunteered to take her, but he works nights and he drives a semi. The last thing I need is my beloved driving off the road because I couldn’t hack being a mom.

But I was tiiiiired and wondering what the heck I’d gotten myself in to and how I ended up being such a crummy mom that I couldn’t get my baby to sleep.

Now, I know you’ll say I’m not a crummy mom – at least I hope you will!!! – but sometimes the heart takes over the head and you’re just convinced that you should know how to take care of your child. People have been telling you that you’re a natural for years – so why can’t you get a grip on things?!?!

Then my sister in law Jeni. And she was exactly what I needed. She invited me over to visit with her friend Rachel (http://thewakefieldfamily2000.blogspot.com/2009/03/prayer.html) who taught me a better way to use my Moby wrap – and lo and behold….MADELYN SLEPT!!!!!!!

And I realized that I forget the loving support system I have around me…that all I have to do is ask for help and it’s there.

And Jeni rocks my world. She’s a great mom and a great friend and if anyone is watching my child and it’s not me, I’m glad it’s her.

I love you Jeni – thank you for calling to today. You were my blessing in disguise.
And thank you Rachel....you've given me a bit of hope that maybe I can get this Moby thing down!

Gigi and Papa

2009-02-26T04:41:00.000-08:00

My dad and step mom ("Papa and Gigi") spent the weekend with us this last weekend. They are absolutely in love with "Papa's pretty princess" and there is nothing more precious than watching your parents love on your child.

Saturday, while they were here, we took Maddy for her first outing to the Sound. We visited Redondo Beach and took a walk along the boardwalk. The day was perfect for it - sunny and brisk! If only all winter days were like this.

Saturday night we went to dinner at Kent Station while Mommy tried not to look like a first time Mommy and relax and just eat her dinner (easier said than done). Seems that Mommy is easy to stress out when her baby cries. Maddy was a little gem though, crying very little.

Monday, Maddy and Mommy dropped off Gigi and Papa at the airport and then went on a little shopping excursion. Mommy needed to return some clothing and pick herself up some decent sweats. And....Maddy taught her a lesson! We were out a little long, which required me to feed her (in the Lane Bryant dressing room....). She decided to make me a little package and boy howdy - it was a total blowout. We're talking poop up the back and everything - and I had NOTHING to change her into. Bad Mommy - no clothing change! Lesson learned! The only sad note about the blow out is that I think we need to move up diaper sizes - she's starting to blow out her diaper every time it's poopy. Moving her out of newborn diapers makes me so sad :( My baby is growing up.

Jim went back to work on Monday. Thus far it hasn't been that bad as he has only worked two days. Things are really slow for him right now and he's only picking up 3 - 4 shifts a week. It's nice to have him home - but always the worry wart, I worry about not having money coming in from at least one of us now that his STD is up. Ahh well...we'll make it :)

We also had a *very* important visitor last week....Maddy's boyfriend, Ryan MacDonald! My dear friend Kim had her precious little one two days after Maddy was born. It's fate....they're meant to be together. Nevermind that Maddy threw up on him while they were taking pictures together (notice her very innocent look when Ryan is crying.....poor guy, the first time on a couch with a girl and he ends up crying). The throwing up part? That's a sign of affection. Really.

Lastly, I've taken some pictures of Madelyn's latest accomplishments. She's decided she can hold her own bottle. That or Daddy was faking it. I'm not sure. She's also doing very well in her tummy time adventures.

And...the cutest thing she does as of late....when we unwrap her from her swaddle, she'll throw her arms up and stretch. She shoots...she SCORES!

As always....a complete collection of the pictures can be found on our Shutterfly site: http://jimandheatherclark.shutterfly.com/babypictures

New Besties!

2009-02-25T22:02:00.000-08:00

One of my dear friends, Deborah, and I have long said our little girls are going to be BEST FRIENDS. Her daughter, Mikayla, was born last June and is absolutely a doll. The perfect BFF for my little girl.

Deb and Mikayla came to visit today - note Mikayla trying to hold Madelyn's hand. True best friends :)

http://www.kodakgallery.com/ShareLanding.action?c=yi7xnw1.38h1wwtl&x=0&y=ufvy5k&localeid=en_US

Changin' Times

2009-02-25T09:32:00.000-08:00

I just have to give a shout out to all of those going through change right now. It can be downright scary even if it's what needs to be happen.

But sometimes the most important steps in life are ones that scare us silly.

So - for all of you who are going through change (and you know who you are)....here's to new beginnings and happier times ahead.

Real Tears

2009-02-19T09:04:00.000-08:00

I had my first horrible mommy moment last night. Madelyn has broken out with baby acne and fairly bad (at least to my eyes) cradle cap. Jim and I gave her a bath before bed. I'm trying to get us on a routine: bath, book, bottle (while rocking), bed. All of the videos and books said that when baby has cradle cap, to wash their scalp and gently brush their head while you're washing.

So....that's what I did. And she seemed fine with it at the time. Madelyn loves her bath time - she really seems to enjoy being in the warm water. She only cries when I dress her. Or undress her for that matter. Miss Thing does not enjoy the dressing and undressing part of anything. She likes to be either fully clothed or naked as a jay bird.

After her bath, I dried her off and started to put her lotion on her - and she started to cry. Just the normal crying - nothing serious, just her telling me she's not enjoying the festivities. But...by the time I was getting to putting her onsie on her, she's in a full on melt down. The kind of crying that is silent, but with a wide open mouth and real, full on tears streaming down her face.

I couldn't even put her jammies on her - I barely got a onsie and a diaper on her. It took me a hour and a half to calm her down enough to swaddle her and attempt to take her to bed. She cried and cried while I held her, till she was hiccuping and doing the half asleep, half sob kind of crying.

I just don't know what we did wrong. If it was her poor little head, which seems rather red and raw (no more shampooing, that's for sure!) or if she was just overly tired and didn't like getting dressed.

But I do know that's the first time she's cried like that and it absolutely broke my heart!!!! Both Jim and I were just beside ourselves, we don't like it when our baby cries at all...and we certainly don't like those kinds of tears.

I sure hope those sorts of melt downs are to a minimum. I don't think Mommy can take those kinds of tears very often!

Love Letter #1

2009-02-15T14:59:00.000-08:00

My dearest Madelyn....
I don't have a baby book for you. I meant to pick one up, but I kept forgetting and I haven't been back to the baby store since you were born.

So this is your baby book....your monthly love letter from your Mommy. You are one month old today. My littlest and dearest baby girl is one month old....and these are the things I love most about my little girl.

I love your cough. You have the cutest and tiniest cough and it just melts my heart. I keep trying to catch it on my camera video, but if I don't, I always want to remember the sound of your tinest cough.

I love your cheeks. You don't have cheeks as chubby as some...but the cheeks you do have I love to nibble. They are so precious to me.

I love your eyes. I think they're going to end up being blue like your daddy's.... and I love the way they cross when they're looking up at me.

I love the way you love your Daddy. You just light up when he has you. You are such a daddy's girl...you burp better for him, you quiet down quicker for him...he's your honey, no doubt about it. And you're his honey too...I knew he's love you, but I wasn't prepared for just how much. He just adores you and loves on you every chance he gets. Sometimes we actually fight over who gets to hold you and love on you. You're his "pumpkin", his "darlin", his "sweetie pie". He calls you beautiful and gorgeous all the time.

You've been growing and growing over the last month. You still don't sleep through the night - and you don't hold your head up yet, but you're starting to smile...and I love that - I love that you're starting to smile at me. That face lights up my heart.

You love to cuddle with us....you sleep the first part of the night (from midnight to 3ish) in your little co-sleeper. But when you wake up for that feeding and then we go back to bed, you don't settle until you're in the middle of Mommy and Daddy. Some people tell us to start training you to go back into your own bed....but Mommy isn't ready for that (and neither is Daddy - this morning I woke up to him holding you in the crook of his arm). I love that you want to sleep in the middle of us - that only lasts for a few years for most kids, and I'm okay with that. Some day, you're going to be just like me and not be as cuddly with your Mom and Dad. I'm okay with letting your cuddle time last as long as possible.

You LOVE your mobile! It fascinates you! It's over your changing table right now - because you're so rarely in your crib. When you do move to your crib, we'll move it. But for now, when we're changing clothes or diapers, it holds your attention like nothing else. It's the first "thing" besides Mommy and Daddy that you just adore.

You like your tummy time. You hold your head up for a minute or two at a time. And you love the sound of things that crinkle....that's what gets your attention most.

You've had a few outings. You and I went for our first Mommy/Maddy shopping trip. We went to Costco and we did just fine! You slept in the Baby Bjorn and I shopped. It worked perfectly.

You've been to Grandma Freda's twice to visit family and friends...and play with your big cousin Sidney. She's quite enamored of you - she tries to get you to play with her toys. She was a little shy at first, but not anymore. She's always trying to convince me she can hold you all by herself. It reminds me of me when my sister Jaime was born. I was about Sidney's age and I was always trying to take care of her on my own.

You've been to Grandpa Jim and Grandma Jody's. They're convinced that you don't cry. Dad and I know better....you do cry, but not much. Your biggest noise is grunting. You grunt all the time. I think it's because you're always trying to work out the gas you swallow when you eat. So...we just tell you to work it on out and grunt all you like.

You've been up to the cabin for the Clark/Smith family weekend. Actually, it was just for dinner. Mom and Dad weren't up for an entire weekend and as you'll learn, someone always comes home from that weekend sick, and we didn't want it to be our little honey. But you did go up and have dinner with everyone - and love on your Aunties and cousins.

Grandma Diane came to visit you. She spoiled you rotten! She let Momma sleep and took the night shift. She rocked you and rocked you...you loved it.

This next four weeks, we're going to work on getting into a routine so Momma and you can get out of the house a little bit more and see the world. There's so much of it to see and I can't wait to show it to you.

I love you my little Madelyn....I love you from your head to your toes. You're just beautiful to me.

More Pictures

2009-02-06T09:56:00.000-08:00

Aside from all the pictures her talented daddy has been taking, my good friend Rebecca took some shots of her. Enjoy!

http://flickr.com/photos/rebeccajeanne/sets/72157613337184004/

Our Miracle

2009-02-04T12:16:00.000-08:00

She's here....and our lives will never be the same.

People tell you that....that you aren't prepared for how much you will love your child - and they're right. I thought I wouldn't be overwhelmed with how much I love her. I thought my previous experiences had me prepared for how much she would mean to me. I was so very wrong.

I will never forget how it felt to bring her into this world. It was, without a doubt, the single most awe inspiring moment of my life. I've had some big moments in my life....saying my vows, being present for the death of my beloved grandmother are among the top two...until now.

This one tops it all - there is nothing like that instant where she moves from being safe and sound inside your body to breathing her first breath. I don't have words for it.

Which, is not to say her delivery was a piece of cake. Well, the delivery part was - honestly, I actually enjoyed the pushing. Of course, I had an epidural by then, just strong enough to take away the major pain, but not the feeling. Up until that epidural, however....all 26 hours up until that epidural... it wasn't so much fun. I'd thought perhaps I'd be able to do it naturally, but man alive was I not up for that.

My labor started around 3 am on Thursday, January 15th. It started as heavy menstral cramps. Strong enough to be painful, but not enough to make me think I was in actual labor. Pregnant women have cramps all the time. The difference, this time, was that they were coming in timable waves. Being the true trooper I was (that's a shameless grab at an 'atta girl), I started working about 6 am. I was uncomfortable, but able to concentrate. By 10 am, that wasn't the case. I was on conference calls and had myself muted because I was having to breath through the cramps. By noon, I couldn't concentrate and I called it a day, thinking these were Braxton Hicks and I'd be right back at it the next day. Her due date wasn't until the following Tuesday, after all. However, my girlfriends convinced me I should time them before I laid down - which I did. They were about 10 minutes apart.

For the rest of the afternoon, I tried to nap. My husband kept saying they were just BH contractions, I couldn't possible be in labor. But at this point, I knew I was in some sort of early labor. BH goes away when you change positions, drink water, lie down. These hadn't gone away.

By 4 pm, they were about 5 minutes apart and I called my OB. Her nurse suggested we hang out another hour or so before going to the hospital and wait for them to be 5 - 3 minutes apart.

The next several hours weren't fun. My contractions would go from 3 minutes apart to 5 minutes to 7 minutes to 2 minutes. They were all over the board - and strong enough to bring tears to my eyes. I wanted to go to the hospital! I was sure I must be dialated to a 3 or 4!

Jim thought we were going too early - and he was right in the end - but I didn't care. We got to the hospital, I was checked, and sure enough - I was a 1 :( They didn't send me home, however, but let me labor in the tub for an hour. In that time, I progressed to a 2. However, there were other signs things were moving along, so they monitored me for another hour. In that time I moved to a 3 and they decided to admit me for good around 11 pm.

The problem was, my contractions weren't in a steady pattern. They were "coupling", which meant they'd come one on top of the other, then several minutes, then a contraction, then several minutes, then several contractions. This isn't considered "productive" laboring, so I was dialating slowly - which meant no epidural.

For those that go naturally, I applaude you. However, I do not handle pain that well....and I was not a happy camper. I didn't yell, I didn't scream. I just cried - a LOT. I ended up having a dose of pain medication. I'd wanted to avoid any narcotics, but I was hurting so terribly, and the nurse assured me we were far enough away from delivery, it wouldn't adversly affect Maddy. That helped for an hour.

Finally, at 4:30, I had a series of contractions that moved me from a 5 to a 6 in ten minutes. Those hurt ALOT....but...they ended with the doctors agreeing I could have an epidural. Ahhhh, pain relief, you are my friend.

Once the epi was in place, I was a happy camper. Jim and I were able to relax - he slept for a few hours, I dozed. We were back up around 10 am. My doctor had stopped in about 7 to check on me. Things hadn't progressed much, so she broke my water. That didn't do much, so I was started on a pitocin drip. By noon, things were far enough along that it was time to push.

Pushing was awesome. It didn't hurt - it was a lot of pressure, but it didn't hurt. And it was exciting to me! It meant Madelyn would be in my arms shortly. I was warned I would push for hours, but after my "test push" at 12:15, I got down to business and pushed her out in record time - an hour and a half.

And life will never be the same.

Things have been interesting, to say the least. She had water on her lungs when she was born and gave us all a bit of a scare. She had a slight case of jaundice, which lead to some feeding issues that have been hugely emotional for me at times. Life just doesn't go exactly the way you planned it to. But with the help of my husband and an amazing pediatrician, we're on the right track.

There are other stories to tell...but little miss is giving me signs it's time to eat - so I must go. But not before I also say that bringing a child into the world with the man you love is amazing - and will make you fall in love with him all over again. Jim is the most amazing father. I don't know what I'd do without him. He has been right by my side, changing the late night diapers, making the bottles, and fussing so over his little girl - she's so in love with him and he's so in love with her - and I'm so in love with them both.

And these are the two little words I've waited most to say.... "she's here".

Count Down

2008-12-19T17:00:00.000-08:00

Well...I have to say, sometimes it helps to just throw what you're thinking out there into the Blogosphere - especially when you forget that there are certain people that pay attention to your blog and can help make you feel a bit better about frustrations you are having.

It's good to know that sometimes someone is watching out for you and cares about you. :)

I haven't posted in some time, and the majority of that has been being nearly 9 months pregnant and so worn out at the end of the day that the last thing I want to do is sit down and write a blog.

But, we have been busy around here...we've attended two baby classes thus far and have Maddy's room all ready. We have a few last minute things that we (I mean I) want to get and have waiting...medicines my girlfriends or the nurses have recommended to have on hand, etc.

Thankfully, I have the next two weeks off and will have an opportunity to get those last minute things done. It's time to pack the hospital bag, wash all of Maddy's new born clothes, stock up on food for Georgie, install the car seat bases, and start baking casseroles! That's my big task for the Christmas and New Year's break - cook and freeze, cook and freeze.

But as for those two baby classes we've gone to - one was a weekend long Childbirth Prep class and one was a Newborn Care class.

Jim will be honestly, he didn't *really* want to go to either class, but especially not the class that was the WHOLE weekend....and he says it was a waste of time, but I think he says that just to get my goat, because at our last Doc's visit, he was asking good questions and understood what she was telling us. And I've noticed that he's started using some of the techniques we talked about to help make me feel better when I'm having a rough, "I don't feel good" moment. So...it was far from a waste of time. I don't think he knows how important that is to me - that he get what's going to be happening as much as I get it. Especially because he wants to be the only one in the room when the pushing starts.And ya'll know me, I'm of the "the more informed you are, the better off you are" variety....the unknown drives me insane, so it was good for me to go and be able to ask questions, not just read a book (and I do lots of that too!)

And speaking of actual childbirth preparations...the baby class scared me into thinking that perhaps it's best to do this completely naturally - no drugs at all. The instructor was great - but she was obviously very much focused on the side of natural child birth. She read us a lot of statistics about how mothers who use pain medications (i.e. epidurals or narcotics) end up with C-sections because of their inability to push. YIKES! That is my biggest fear - an epidural. I talked to my doctor and she agreed that it can happen, but that she was pretty laid back, she'd let things go a long time before she'd be forceful about suggesting a C section. So....I'm going to go into it open to whatever it takes, but attempting to go the distance without any drugs. We'll see how it goes.

To help myself through that - I've been listening to some hypo birth CDs....and I have to say, they're pretty relaxing. I don't know how relaxing they'll be when I'm having contractions, but it's worth a shot. Jim is really supportive, he wanted to do it this way all along....so we've been practicing our labor positions, talking a lot about what he can do to help, etc.

I'm still naturally nervous - but it'll all work out in the end, even if I'm begging for the drugs and I don't have time to get them, centuries of woman have done this, I can do it too :)

The other class we have been to is the Newborn Prep class. I was glad we went, I got to ask a lot of good questions and get some good suggestions - and I have to say, I was proud of my boy, he's an excellent diaper changer (even though he thinks he's not going to change any...riiiiiiight) and an even BETTER swaddler. He's really good at it! And he's also really good at the "tummy" hold they recommend to help sooth babies with a gassy tummy...better at it than me! So....I see some tummy time coming Daddy's way ;)

Other than that....we've just been trying to lay low and take care of the minute stuff I mentioned. We got our stroller - yea! Installed our infant car seat bases - yea! Jim's diligently washing all of Maddy's newborn items for me...just the final prep stuff. And life got a lot easier when we decided to lay low on Christmas this year. I didn't even decorate. That's sooooo unlike me, but I didn't want to have to put it all away in two weeks, I knew I wouldn't have the energy. I don't even think I'm going to get a Christmas card/letter out to anyone this year. Again....lame....but I just haven't had the energy.

Anyhoots....the countdown is on, I have 32 more days until my due date - not that she wouldn't come early or late....but realistically, since they won't let you go more than 2 weeks over due, I have at most 46 more days I'll be carrying this little girl around. Part of me is excited to not be pregnant anymore - but I have to be honest, outside of the constant back ache, lack of good sleep, and rib pain, I love having her there. I love it when she moves....especially if I start talking to her or Jimmy starts talking to her...that's pretty cool.

And now that she's the size of a honeydew melon, if she moves, I feel it - there ain't much room there!

Your baby, now as hefty as a honeydew melon at 5 1/4 pounds, doesn't have much room to maneuver in your belly. (Length: more than 18 inches, headto heel.)

Frustrated Spirit

2008-12-04T13:03:00.000-08:00

Have you ever really wanted to succeed at something you were asked to do? It's something that's a huge opportunity for you and you want to do well. You want to prove that you're capable of more than you've been asked to do before.

But for reasons that have nothing to do with you, you aren't getting anywhere. There are outside influences that control the amount of time you have to devote to what you're doing. There are others who do not have time to help you achieve your goal...and you need the input and assistance of those others in order to be successful. There are some who didn't see the importance of what you were trying to accomplish. You've been saying all along this was important - but you couldn't get anyone else to see the urgency or the importance until too late. And so it's hurry up and wait, hurry up and wait.

And you start to get frustrated. You start to feel useless and ineffectual. You start to wonder what you're doing and why you care so very much...but you do, because that's your nature. You want to be successful, both in your own endeavors and in assisting people make something a reality, help build something of value. That is part of what defines you - being a part of helping build things of value.

And all the while you have this huge event in your life that's putting a very real time line on things - the birth of your daughter. It's given you a deadline that won't change. It's like a big brick wall that's going to stop all of your other efforts you've been working so very hard toward. You didn't mean it to be that way. You don't want to be one of those women who uses being a mother as an excuse to be less effective in other spheres of your life. But its there - and it's happening - and it scares you that somehow if you fail in this endeavor it will be your last chance to be a useful and trustworthy member of anything other than the Mommy sphere. And that's not what you want.

You realize that being a Mother is the most important thing you'll ever do, every kick she gives you reminds you of the amazing change you're about to go through and that now someone will rely on you for safety, for security, for love, warmth, for her very existence.
You also know that you have worked hard to get where you are - and you don't want that to be over.
You want to continue to be an equal contributor to the bottom line for your family.
You feel protective of the family you and your husband are building and you want to protect their financial future.
You're scared of the economy and what not being successful might mean.

And you just don't know what to do about it....you feel so lost and for the first time you understand what other women talk about when they talk about the fear of being a mother, not just the excitement.

The fear of what that means for the financial security of your life.
The fear of not being everything you know you can be.

And it's frustrating.
And scary.
And so very where I'm at right this very moment.

Turkey Tales...

2008-12-02T12:00:00.000-08:00

Well...I'm back from my Turkey Day adventures.

I have no pictures to share, just yet, because I don't have my own camera and thus am relying on the generosity of friends and family to send me their pictures. :::hint hint:::

Thanksgiving was a wonderful day, spent with my Dad and Stepmom, brother Drew and his family, and sister Bree and her boyfriend Jonanan (I mean Jonathan....but my nephew used to call him Jonanan and it's stuck in my head). My parents' best friends Robert and Carol were also there for the fun. Nothing is as wonderful as good food and family laughter.

Friday wasn't as much fun, unfortunately. I have really bad luck with cars, it would seem. I was headed from my Dad's house (in the outlying town of Caldwell) to my Mom's house (in Boise). I stopped by my mom's branch to say hello, pick up the cake for the baby shower (that needed to be kept refrigerated), and have her remind me of the garage code. I was driving my parent's PT Whoser (another newphewism).

I got to my Mom's and the garage code didn't work. It turns out the battery in the garage key pad had run out. : So, I decided to head back to my Mom's work and pick up the key. It's about noon and Maddy is telling me she's hungry, so I pull through the McDonald's drive through for some Fries. Apparently that was a bad idea, because as I was pulling away from the drive through, someone parked to the right of me backed right into the car. My parent's car. That I was driving. Crap. Nothing makes you feel worse that having something like that happen to you. In your parent's car. Hello...feelings of teenagehood all over again. Even though it's not my fault and I know they won't be mad at me. 16 all over again. And not in a good way.

Dude comes out of his car apologizing all over himself - and as I'm prying the belly out of the car, he sees that I'm pregnant, the color drains from his face. I sort of felt sorry for him - but not really - he just hit me. In my parent's car! UGH! After a call or two to my parents (hello...I couldn't find the insurance and registration that was right in front of my face), we exchange information (the police do not come to accidents without injury on private property :( :( ). The PT Whooser and I limp away (it's going to be okay - it wasn't major damage, at least I don't think it was) and instead of going to my Mom's office, I go to my brother's house down the street.

My 6 year old nephew (of Jonanan and PT Whooser fame) is still in his kiddy boxers playing video games when I get there. I tease him for hanging out in his "underwears", but really, I'm jealous that it's nearly 1 and he's still in his underwear. Those days are gone for me, unfortunately ;) I hang out there until my brother and his family needed to leave and then head back to my Mom's. It's like 3:30 by this point and Mom, who gets off at 4:30 should be home at any time. I have my book and a car that's warm....and the cake, oh yeah, THE CAKE! I hadn't noticed it'd fallen off the back seat onto it's side. Luckily it survived the crash for the most part....but DANG!

Only...Mom doesn't get off at 4:30. Mom doesn't get off till 5:30, so I'm sitting there till nearly 6. And it's dark now and I can't read any more :::queue pitiful, poor me music right here::: When Mom shows up (I hadn't called her, no reason to panic her - there was nothing she could do) and we head into the house, she looks at the door to find it unlocked. The entire time. The front door was open. I could have come in before the accident. To a warm house. And food. And a couch to nap on.

::::banging pregnant head against wall::::::

Ahhhh...luck. It wasn't with me on Friday.

Saturday I has a wonderful day with my dear friend Martha and my family. Once again, people were too generous to Maddy and she truly now has too many clothes to wear. Seriously. No more clothes. Unless they're 9 months or bigger. They won't get worn. Promise.

Sunday came too quickly and I had to fly back home - which was both sad (I hate leaving my family) and happy (I missed my husband a LOT!!!!)

And now here it is Tuesday already.

And I'm having a baby in like 7 weeks. 7 WEEKS PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!! HOLY COW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You can pass the brown paper bag now, I think I might hyperventilate.

I'm Leeeeeeeavin..

2008-11-26T07:25:00.001-08:00

on a jet plane!!!

I'm going home to Idaho, yahoooooo!!!! I'm really looking forward to it. With the crazy events of this year, every single trip I planned to take home got cancelled - either because of a medical issue or bad timing.

Thankfully, my OB said I could fly home for Turkey Day - the conversation went something like this:

Me: "Dr. S, I really want to go home for Turkey Day"

Dr. S: "Well go then....how long of a drive is it, two, three hours?" (She's from the South and came up here after Katrina)

Me: "Ummm, no - it's 9 hours driving in the winter, I'd like to fly, it's only an hour flight"

Dr. S: "And who exactly will be taking you to the airport?"

Me: "My honey, of course"

Dr. S: "And who will be picking you up?"

Me: "My dad, probably"

Dr. S: "And you promise not to life a single bag....and no carry ons except your purse?"

Me: "Absolutely"

Dr. S: "And you'll go to the local hospital and have them call me if a single thing even seems strange?"

Me: "Of course..."

Dr. S: "Well....okay then...but this is it, little lady - after this, I don't want you more than an hour from the hospital, in traffic!"

And with that....I'm off!!!!! And I'm especially excited that I'll get to see my BFF from high school. It's been YEARS since we've actually been in Idaho at the same time and were there long enough at the same time to be able to see each other! Although, I think it entirely unfair that we see each other when she's looking all hot (she's been working out like a fiend with her own personal trainer...as chronicled in her heeeeeeelairous blog) and I'm 8 freakin months pregnant (and the only hot look I've got is the one I get when I'm having a hot flash).

She better not bail on me for our 20th High School reunion, she owes me now.

At any rate....Happy Thanksgiving my friends - despite the economy and the events of the world, we have a lot to be thankful for!

32 Weeks...

2008-11-25T17:32:00.000-08:00

That's 8 months people.

That's astonishing to me - where has the time gone?!?! And Maddy keeps growing and growing (and letting me know aaaaaaall about how much room she has in there).

This week she's the size of a Jicama...

And for an upclose and personal look at her little face during my 28 (4 weeks ago!!!!) week ultrasound...here's her face. I must put a disclaimer that my husband hates these pictures, they weird him out, so I promised him I wouldn't post tons of them. I personally think she has an adorable nose and tiny cute little lips!

Maddy's Room!!!!!

2008-11-24T21:26:00.001-08:00

Goofball Moves

2008-11-24T11:04:00.000-08:00

Well howdy there dear readers…. I know I’ve been the silent blogger as of late. Things have continued to be a little hectic in my world and by the time I have time to blog, I’m exhausted and it’s not part of what I want to be doing. I’m lame, I know.

On the home front, I had my baby shower a week ago. It was AMAZING! We have so many cute outfits for our little munchkin…we can’t wait to have her here (not early…on time would be fine…even late…yes, I’m still saying I could go a week or two late and be okay) to dress up. I’ll post more about it when I have some pictures – I’m waiting for some wonderful friends who took tons of photos to get some to me J But mostly, it’s amazing to have such a network of women that you know are going to love your little girl. It makes a pregnant mama sniffle back a few tears.

George has gotten some good news… Jim and I had noticed that he was walking pretty tenderly these days, and rarely joining us upstairs. So, my wonderful husband (he’s been SO helpful around the house lately, I honestly don’t know what I’d do without him and I’m really dreading him going back to work in January….I’ll miss his companionship and help when he goes back to a hard core work schedule) took Georgie to the vet. She gave him some medicine we’ve been trying and it’s like a whole new kitty! His joints obviously aren’t hurting his as much; he’s much more playful, coming up stairs, acting like his normal Georgie self.

The BEST news is that the heart murmur she heard about a year ago is non-existent!!!!! YEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jim acted like he was disappointed, he always likes to tease me that he’s anti-cat…but I know how much he loves Georgie….so whatever J
We’ve finally finished Maddy’s nursery!!! I’ll be taking pictures to post tonight, but it’s done! Well…one proviso – the shades we ordered were cut incorrectly – so the manufacturer is resending them – but all the hardware is up, so we just have to pop them in. And…we’re thinking about changing out the light fixture – it’s a big room with one itty bitty light in the ceiling – drives me nuts – but floor lamps used in a toddler’s room are a bad idea. We’ll see if that gets changed out or not.

But the event that causes the title of the post – oiy – thank goodness for AAA.
Yesterday, Jimmy and I were out running errands and stopped for gas. He got out; put the keys in the middle console. He needed my help, so I got out; shut the door, with my purse inside. SOMEHOW (and we don’t know if I hit the lock button or when he tossed the keys in the console he hit the lock button) we got locked out. At the gas station. In the cold. With no jackets. With no phone. And I’m 8 months pregnant. Luckily, Jim had his wallet in his back pocket, so we had our AAA card. We asked the store if we could use their phone and called them. 45 minutes (and about 2 seconds to get in) later, we were back in our car…little icicles…..and headed for home. I was supposed to go to a party, but with that little side line, I wasn’t able to go – I was frozen and would have been an hour late.

So, I hung at home with my honey – which is honestly my favorite thing to do – outside of shopping with my Sisters-in-Law (which I did this weekend….I so big pink puffy heart them).

And on the topic of people I big pink puffy heart….I want to mention how much I am in love with my husband. He is so supportive and so wonderful and it’s really an amazing feeling to know that there is someone who loves you most in the world and will always be there to take care of you. We still have our issues that we work with - and I’m probably more vocal about those things these days…these damn hormones are something wicked (not that they’re not valid points of things we need to work on…but I get more emotional about things quicker) – but all in all…he just warms up my heart and I think the best decision I’ve ever made in my life was to marry him.